(Closed) Courthouse wedding vs real wedding

posted 4 years ago in Elopement
  • poll: How should we elope?
    Just the two of us : (16 votes)
    38 %
    Two of us and our parents : (10 votes)
    24 %
    The two of us, our immediate family & all the complications that come with : (16 votes)
    38 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    9145 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

    Really elope and don’t tell anyone when you’re going to the courthouse.

    Post # 4
    Member
    3697 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    I would be pissed if my brother got married without me too.  You are really getting married, even if you don’t celebrate it for a year.  Let your family come and witness it.  Have the party and vow renewal with the white dress next year, but you’re getting married at the JOP, let them be a part of it!

    Post # 5
    Member
    1193 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    @Lrroma181986:  you shouldn’t  have told them your plans. Just elope then announce the wedding later. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    1091 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    A courthouse wedding is a real wedding.
    Just elope with no big celebration later.

    Post # 9
    Member
    3697 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    @Lrroma181986:  I’m with her.  I’d have moved heaven and earth to be there when my baby brother got married.  They’ll make it work if they care.  That’s a Friday, that’s a reasonable accomodation for people with jobs to be able to get there.

    Post # 10
    Member
    291 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    I agree, either elope or just let them be there as witnesses. 

    We’re doing the same thing except ours will only be 2 months apart. The courthouse wedding will be this weekend and our “real” wedding will be in July. 

    Like you, we’re not treating the courthouse wedding as our real wedding. (We’re not even moving in together until after the real wedding) But our family will be there though. My parents will be there and FI’s parents and siblings will be there as well. After the ceremony, we’ll all go out for lunch. For dinner, we’ll be having some friends over. Our real wedding will be overseas so those who won’t be able to come will be coming to the dinner this weekend. 

    Although we didn’t want to do anything special, we’re fine with our family being there and then going out for lunch after. They are just going to be there, like standing/sitting and waiting for the ceremony to be over. There’s no flowers and other frou frous anyway so no big deal. 

    As for the dinner, we’re just looking at it as a sort of groom/bridal shower dinner with close friends. 

    Post # 11
    Member
    4525 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    @Lrroma181986:  We are getting married out of state but will probably get our license in our home state. I had no idea until I started digging around on here that family members might consider the day we sign our license our “wedding day” and be ticked off they werent there. It’s a new concept to me. We will be proceeding with our original plan to just go ourselves. If you are going to have an actual ceremony later, you should consider it as well.

    Post # 12
    Member
    1966 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @bellaluna290:  this

    My sisters & brother are all really close. When we talked about eloping they all said they’d be upset if we ran off & got married without them. And I get it, ultimately we’re not eloping. Had we done a courthouse wedding (that’s a real wedding) we would have had our parents & siblings. 

    Post # 13
    Member
    5206 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2013

    @Lrroma181986:  I was in your situation and honestly I regret not having more people there. We originally didn’t even want our parents there, just our 2 witnesses. But they showed up anyway (along with a couple more friends) and looking back I’m glad they did. No matter where your documents are signed it’s still the official day you got married and holds special significance. You don’t have to have a dozen people there but it’s nice to have your siblings there.

    Post # 15
    Member
    2390 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    A courthouse wedding is just as real as any other wedding, because it’s when, you know, get married.  

    No one is forcing you to do anything – either get married now and have a vow renewal later, or just get married now and move on with your lives (which is what I would do), or just wait and do what you had planned.

    You’re an adult and can make your own choices.

    Post # 16
    Member
    1091 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @Lrroma181986:  Then you can wait and have the wedding AND the celebration in one fell swoop. Or you could go to the courthouse and then later that day (or weekend) have a nice dinner with your respective families

    The topic ‘Courthouse wedding vs real wedding’ is closed to new replies.

    Get our weekly roundup of the best of Weddingbee.
    I agree to receive emails from the site. I can withdraw my consent at any time by unsubscribing.

    Find Amazing Vendors