(Closed) Cousin Gave Her Regifted Bridal Shower as My Wedding Present

posted 6 years ago in Gifts and Registries
Post # 17
11268 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

@MrsPanda99:  this is exactly what i was thinking. 

“thank you so much for the crystal pitcher.  it matches the one that i got you for your shower.”


@RCH1286:  honestly, if you don’t care for the woman, just ignore her.  be polite at family functions but you don’t have to go out of your way to spend any time with her.  focus on your real, true friends.

Post # 18
3120 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

Rude.  But you got $125 out of it!  Just know you’ve outclassed her and let it go.

Post # 19
4767 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

Consider it a refund for attending her shower, she gave you a check as well so that was generous.  She prob forgot who gave her the pitcher.  You probably liked it since you bought is so enjoy! 

Post # 20
11744 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

I don’t really see what the big deal is. I’d be embarassed if I blatantly regifted something but she gave you cash on top of it.  Maybe after she got it she decided she really didn’t need it, or received 2 of them and figured you’d like it.  We should always graciously accept gifts regardless of where they came from.  If you don’t even like her that much, why is it even insulting?  I really wouldn’t care if I got an obvious regift, but I can see it being slightly more offensive from someone you’re close with vs someone you hate. I think you should let this one go and move on. It won’t do you any good to be upset over it or to say something to her. Ultimately, if you’re rude to her over the gift, you’re the one who ends up looking bad.

Post # 21
522 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I think the worse part is the fact that she didn’t invite your dad to her wedding.  My stomach dropped when I read that.  Ugh.

As for the regift, however, all you need to do is send a thank you card.  Don’t stoop to her level.  Whether she regifted it back to you intentionally or not, it isn’t worth getting into a fight about.  Just write the card and be done with her.

Post # 22
394 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@eeniebeans:  +1,000

For me, the bigger insult here is that she did not invite your Dad to her wedding ~ I’d write her off for that POS move alone.   Sounds like cutting her out of your life won’t be much of a loss.

On the bright side, shrug this off and enjoy that lovely pitcher…what’s not to love about Waterford???  = )

Post # 23
1572 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@MrsPanda99:  +1 I love that idea, mentioning that you have matching vases, and ask to see it LOL. Love it.

Post # 24
1935 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2014

@RCH1286:  Chick is rude as heck. She seems unable to enjoy anyone else being happy. 

I’d send her a thank you note for the check only. And leave it at that. Don’t stoop to her level, however maddening her immature and totally obvious snub was. 

Post # 25
7646 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2012

@RCH1286:  I love the dig. I don’t care if it is rude and it is stooping to her level. That was a bitch move on her part.

Post # 26
9134 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

Be the better person here and send a generic thank you note and get over it.  Either she gorot you gave it to her, or more likely, she remembered and thought if you thought it was nice enough to gift, it was nice enough to re-gift back to you.  Pretty s#itty of her but don’t stoop to her levvel.  She knows what she did and if you take the high road here, she will be the one in the wrong.  If you respond s#itty then she will know she got a rise out of you and she will probably make it out that she was the victim in the situation.

Post # 27
604 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@MrsPanda99:  I love this response!  It points out that you know it was a regift but it’s not so confrontational.

Moral of the story – always give someone a gift you’d want to receive yourself…you just may!!  LOL

Post # 28
391 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013


It would be so tempting to call her out on it, but etiquette is all about taking the high road so that’s what you should probably do. I like the @MrsPanda99 response. 🙂 


Post # 29
806 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

You guys are way nicer than me…my first thought was “well I know what M is getting for Christmas now”. 😉

Post # 31
834 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013 - The front lawn of our church

Incredibly rude but I don’t think it’s worth your time and energy to make a big issue of it. Let it go. You said in your post you don’t see her much anyway. Sounds like it wouldn’t be difficult just to keep your distance from her.

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