- 5 years ago
- Wedding: June 2014
I think you should use this as an opportunity to practice some distance from negatice energy. You don’t have to share everything with her and it sounds like you’d be better off not doing so if you are left with negative feelings everything you do it. Maybe it’s even time for some distance from the rest of the family if they compulsively compare the two of you.
Make this time about you and your fiance. You only have to suffer as much as you are giving others the opportunity to inflict suffering upon you. Don’t give in to family pressure to do everything with or parallel to her. Tell people you want the wedding details to be a surprise if you have to.
I have noticed as I get older that “one uppers” and competitive types only tend to get worse as stakes become higher. It’s one thing when the playing field is somewhat level as you are growing up…but the school, career, wedding, travelling, buying a home, having kids….I’ve watched these types of people become just insufferable over those things. I know it shard when you’ve have a history with someone but if it’s constant negativity and bad feelings/stress for you, it’s not a relationship worth keeping close. Distance yourself and fill the space that remains with people who lift you up and make you a better person. Life is too short.