Post # 1
Hi Bees! It’s my first post here, have been a long-time lurker!
Me and my Fi are planning our August 2013 wedding and booked my DREAM venue! I’m so in love with it! Only problem is his Mother’s side of the family is HUGE and we have pretty tight restrictions on numbers. He has an issue inviting some cousins and not others, but most of them are married or engaged and lots have small children 🙁
How can we invite some but not others (bearing in mind we only ever see them at other weddings and most of them don’t know who I am!) without offending?
I know this is an oft-asked dillema but it’s so tricky!
Thank you so much!
Post # 3
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
If you have a max number of guests (I’ll make it easy and say 100)- you can split the guest list with 25 people each invited for your family, FI’s family, your friends, FI’s friends.
Adjust the numbers if you have to, and you can bump it up a *little*, since you will have regrets. Unfortunately, no matter what you do, it seems inevitable that *someone* will get offended. If you invite 2 children from one aunt and not the other, “you forgot to invite John!” “No, we haven’t seen him in 5 years, and have tight venue restrictions.”
I only invited one out of 13 cousins- she’s the only one I’ve seen in the past 5 years/is on my Christmas card list. We didn’t invite children- which caused some MAJOR family drama, but it eventually got resolved, and that cut 12 off the guest list.
If Fiance only has contact with these cousins at weddings/funerals, it’s obviously not a close relationship. If he’s not close to any of his cousins, don’t invite any of them! You don’t have to balance it- bride can have cousins at the wedding and groom doesn’t have to. Hope this helps!
Post # 4
I have a ton of cousins, some of whom have started having kids themselves, so we said no kids of cousins. We’re limiting the kids to nieces/nephews and first cousins only (there’s just a few teens left). It’s perfectly acceptable to limit the number of children at your wedding. That might be easier than picking and choosing among first cousins.
Post # 5
I have WAY too many cousins to invite them all, so I am not inviting any. Fiance has 2 cousins, one whome just got married so they are invited. (We also see them on a fairly regular basis…i never see my cousins)….