(Closed) Coworker HOUNDING me to get pregnant and makes SHOCKING suggestion

posted 8 years ago in TTC
Post # 17
850 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

View original reply
@Armina33:  If she presses you on why you don’t want to discuss the issue anymore, you just need to be a broken record. You could vaguely state that this is something you and your husband have talked about and decided it needs to be kept private.

OR you could simply ask, “How’s YOUR sex life?”

Post # 18
6933 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Boy #1 12/2015, boy #2 02/2018

@Armina33:  She is a very bad influence. Get away!

Post # 19
183 posts
Blushing bee

@Armina33:  Wow.  She is totally out of line (and probably a little “off,” too).  I think it’s a relatively easy problem to fix though.  You don’t have to be rude, but tell her that how you go about TTC is something you’d like to keep between you and your husband alone.  Then just don’t engage her whenever she brings it up.  Don’t respond, just change the subject and move on.  And certainly don’t take it personally or take her seriously — there’s clearly something a little strange about this woman.  If she doesn’t let it drop, you probably need to keep her at arm’s length from here on out.

When I was working my first job, I was in my early 20s and befriended a coworker who was a bit older to me–closer to 30.  She was divorced and had a young child, and though our lifestyles weren’t all that similar with me being younger and single, we hit it off right away.  We were friends for years, I babysat her daughter, we hung out outside of work, and we went to the gym together.  And then one day out of the blue she started in on me about how I needed to have babies, and SOON, because I wouldn’t want to be an “old” mother. She would make disparaging remarks about how “old” mothers are selfish, and how no one should ever bring a child into this world over the age of 30.  Meanwhile I was getting older and having trouble finding the right guy, and she would NOT LET UP about how I needed to get pregnant right away.  She went so far to suggest that I should just get pregnant by anybody who would do the deed, so that I wouldn’t be an “old mom.”  I heard about this every single day.  Eventually I just stopped arguing with her or discussing it with her, and tried to let the subject drop.  It got to a point where I had to cut the relationship off outside of work.  I was still friendly with her at work, until one day she blew up at me, screaming at me, in the middle of our office, for no good reason, and I realized that her meddling was a sign that she had bigger issues than I ever knew, and I just had to stop associating with her completely.  I was sad to see the friendship go, but some “friends” aren’t worth keeping.

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