(Closed) Coworker invited me to wedding, then putting me to work…

posted 5 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 2
46971 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

Kukla:  Just say no. Tell her you were looking forward to being able to relax and enjoy her wedding and are not prepared to work on your day off

Post # 3
804 posts
Busy bee

Definitely say no to being a coordinator, and just decline the invite if you think it will make work awkward.

Post # 4
2074 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

Just say no. This lady is your co-worker – is she even your friend??

Post # 5
148 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Agree, just say no. After all, you are going to be so busy arranging your own wedding details!

Post # 6
8876 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

I don’t see what the big deal is? If it is something you don’t want to do be the adult that you are and say no. If your other colleagues can’t say no then that is their problem. Stop creating stress for yourself.


Post # 7
9022 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

tell her no, unless she is paying you.  and why wouldn’t your SO be invited.  you are engaged to each other.  i would probably decline this invitation.  she really doesn’t sound like a friend.

Post # 8
8690 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

j_jaye:  I was thinking the same thing. OP, you’re stressing yourself out here. We are all capable of saying no and you need to do that here and ASAP. 

Post # 9
628 posts
Busy bee

Kukla:  Are you actually friends with this person? If not, sounds like she is just trying to take advantage of you and get services for free. You’re not really “invited” if you’re working. It’s also rude to exclude the person you’re engaged to. 

You don’t want to go, so don’t. That’s what I would do. 

Post # 10
2598 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Kukla:  You should tell her no.  

What your other co-workers choose to do is up to them and not your responsibility.  It is incredibly rude for her to ask you to be an unpaid wedding coordinator and day laborer.  

Either tell her you will be unable to attend or help or tell her you would prefer to attend as a guest.

She is the one being out-of-line.  Don’t let her make you feel awkward or guilty. 

Post # 11
1282 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

Agree with PPs. Tell her no, you are too busy planning your OWN wedding to plan hers/coordinate for her. The fact that she is not inviting spouses/SO’s even further shows that she is trying to take advantage of the situation. 

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