Post # 1
I am a teacher. Today another teach approached me and told me that she and another science teacher in my building wanted to throw me a wedding shower at her house. She asked me to put together a list of people in the building to invite and to give me her a date that worked.
I am so flattered that these two have thought of me, but I don’t know if I can accept. I currently am not inviting any of my coworkers to my wedding. I have only been at my current high school for two years and this year I am teaching an extra class and coaching, and planning a wedding so I haven’t been as social as I would have liked to have been. I feel bad asking people to buy me a gift that aren’t invited to the wedding and that I haven’t really had time to see much outside of school…
What would you suggest I do? Suck it up and give her a list and hope people come and don’t think I’m tacky? Tell her I’m flattered, but decline?
Ugh!! I don’t know what to do!
Post # 3
You have to work with her, so I would invite her and the science teacher and their SO’s.
Post # 4
I also teach high school for the second year. I kind of live in the fine arts wing though.
I have no clue if they are going to do anything. But usually, we host these kinds of things after school one afternoon, and all of the people either chip in like $10 towards a big present, or a gift card. It’s more of a get together at work than having everyone go out and buy large presents.
Post # 5
Some places have a tradition of throwing office showers without the expectation that those who attend will be invited to the wedding. Can you ask around and see if this is the case at your school? If so, then it’s just a nice tradition that won’t raise anyone’s expectations.
Post # 6
I might ask around…I wouldn’t mind if it was going to be after work or at school, but she wants to host it at her house. This year I have been living in my classroom(s)!
Perhaps I’ll recommend we do it during an inservice day for lunch…
Post # 7
Definitely ask around. It’s often the custom in certain workplaces to have work showers without the expectation that everybody is invited.
Post # 8
- Wedding: June 2010 - New York Botanical Garden
I actually think it’s ok for them to offer to throw the shower for you and for you to not invite your coworkers – they offered, so it was up to them and they want to do this for you. I would enjoy and if by any chance it comes up, I think you can say that you couldn’t invite all your coworkers so you didn’t invite any.
Post # 9
Perhaps you can suggest that you have a party but they don’t bring presents since they aren’t invited to the wedding. It’s always okay to say you can’t invite them because you’re not having a large wedding, but because of that you’d like to have a party with them.