(Closed) crushed :(

posted 8 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
116 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Hang in there! I am sure he has another fabulous idea how to propose! It’s coming! 

Post # 4
Member
482 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

wow, that was pretty mean. i think if i was you though i would have addressed the situation outside of email, phone, texting…whatever. i would flat out ask him to his face…”why did you say that to me?” i would hope he’s not purposly dangling an engagement in front of you…i will never understand the thinking behind this. it’s cruel really, when a guy knows how badly his SO wants to get married. i’d tell him to his face…that hurt.

Post # 6
Member
2321 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I am really sorry to hear you are so crushed. Those types of mean spirited jokes are never funny. I mean, no one laughs in the end. I don’t know why people have to use them!

And why did you want the pandora bead? I am sure he’s got another cat in the bag. So hang in there. And if you know he hasn’t read the email yet then ask him to delete it. He can do that for ya. Smile

Post # 10
Member
600 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2006

I get that it feels mean, and I’d probably have reacted similarly, but I wonder if he was totally joking the first time to throw you off the scent?  And it could be he already felt ring pressure and then bead pressure just made his head explode and he reacted jerkily… kind of like the straw that broke the camel’s back.  Definitely talk to him and let him know the joking is through, but be careful because he could have a surprise proposal coming up and being pissed at him for a long time could ruin that.  My guy does that sometimes (even my parents!) “If you want ___ you won’t get ___!” and then I end up getting both, always.

Post # 12
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I’m assuming he wants it to be a surprise so him saying “yea if you don’t want your engagement ring.” was just meant as a joke?  I doubt he wants you to know ahead of time the exact date he will be proposing.

Post # 14
Member
962 posts
Busy bee

@nikkiinmass:

I’m personally glad you sent the email. I agree with you. While I don’t feel like we should be nagging our guys and while I understand the importance of keeping quiet about engagement in general, I do think his statement/ behavoir was a little unkind. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, perhaps he was just trying to “throw you off” and “get you excited.” Your email let him know that he went too far and that in the future he needs to tailor it back a little. Nothing wrong with that.

Post # 15
Member
962 posts
Busy bee

@nikkiinmass:

I’m personally glad you sent the email. I agree with you. While I don’t feel like we should be nagging our guys and while I understand the importance of keeping quiet about engagement in general, I do think his statement/ behavoir was a little unkind. Giving him the benefit of the doubt, perhaps he was just trying to “throw you off” and “get you excited.” Your email let him know that he went too far and that in the future he needs to tailor it back a little. Nothing wrong with that.

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