(Closed) Crying my eyes out….

posted 5 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 3
Member
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

You do what you and your Fiance agree on. Do not let your in laws pressure you if you are not ready to be married at this moment.

Have you talked to a lawyer about how your marriage will affect the custody battle? It may not matter which makes it a moot point. Get all the information before making a decision.

Post # 4
Member
3357 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Get all the information before making a decision.”

I second that.

Post # 5
Member
5273 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Couldn’t you still marry in the church (unless booked to capacity) but maybe you can find one with availbility this month/next month, then do a small reception at your home? 

That way you will still have the feeling of a wedding this time & can have a bigger celebration later. 

Post # 6
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

First of all, Hugs!! I know you’re emotional right now because you feel like your dreams are being ruined. Take a deep breath and try to relax. Nothing is being ruined. What’s really important in the end of all this? Are you getting married for the wedding or for your husband? In february my sister had a court wedding because she was tired of waiting to be married to her best friend but they are still having a nice wedding and reception in a couple of years. Focus on what is important, don’t let the little details get you upset. Getting married right now is not going to mess anything up.

Also, don’t let the in-laws make you feel guilty for anything. Mine are the same way but this is MY wedding and i’m not going to live the rest of my life wishing I had done it my way.

Good luck!

Post # 8
Member
174 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I am so sorry your in-laws are putting so much pressure on you. This is clearly a very emotional time for everyone. I would definitely talk to the lawyer to make sure that being married would really help your fiance’s custody case. But that should not be your deciding factor- you need to make sure that you are ready to get married. If you decide to get married immediately, then you can always have a big celebration later, or a vow renewal. Then you could have the ceremony of your dreams!

Best of luck, hon. This must all seem overwhelming, but I am sure it will work out! And congratulations on becoming a mom!

Post # 9
Member
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

@vicgroesz5:  I, personally, would hate to lie about it. My sister told everyone, she isn’t a very emotional person though, she didn’t care. I get where you want to wait so that the actual wedding is still exciting but no matter what people are going to be thrilled for you on your big day. I would just be honest with everyone. It’s not like you can keep the pregnancy a secret so I would just say “We decided to get legally married for the baby but plan on having our ceremony and reception next year to celebrate”. Something like that so people still know whats going on.

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