(Closed) Curious – do your FMIL/FFIL ask how much bits of the wedding cost?

posted 7 years ago in Money
Post # 3
Member
1920 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

Money is always a difficult subject. Some people are more open about talking about it than others. Perhaps shes just curious about the cost of weddings. I think its interesting to know what people payed too. And if you are paying for things yourself no one can really judge as its your decision.

Post # 4
Member
1328 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

No, but Future Father-In-Law assumed we were spending $108,376,463,286,472,300 on the wedding and called me a gold digger.  (Our budget is….$5,000)

Post # 5
Member
1486 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

mine asked, well they asked my Fiance… not me

Post # 6
Member
646 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

If you don’t want to answer, don’t. It wouldn’t bother me, though… She’s probably just curious. If she thinks the place is too “cheap,” she can pay for it. πŸ™‚

Post # 8
Member
3314 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

My in-laws didn’t ask me anything about the costs of the wedding, although my hubby and I were pretty open with sharing information with them.  They were (and for that matter still are!) really cute about it though and would sneak peeks at my wedding journal that I have on another site.  They still do this even after the wedding just to see if there is anything new that we haven’t specifically told them about.  Not in a creepy way though, they just love to hear what’s going on in our lives.  We live 6k miles away from us, so I know they miss my husband very very much!

Post # 9
Member
4109 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

My inlaws contributed a very large portion of the entire wedding cost, so I honestly didn’t have problems telling them exactly how thier money was/will be spent- they live in different state, & it makes them feel more involved if we let them in on the details… I’m a bargain hunter & I get thrilled to show off my finds anyway. BUT I know what you mean- if I want to upgrade anything from the ‘standard’ I feel like they might think I’m spoiled, ungrateful, etc. Like the PP suggested, maybe your Future Mother-In-Law is just curious? I would just tell her (she WILL be family!), it’s not like it’s for her approval- she can’t tell you how to spend it! Not sharing it with her may end in a more uncomfortable situation than how you feel now IMO. Good luck πŸ™‚  

Post # 10
Member
2066 posts
Buzzing bee

They did not ask how much anything cost.  I think it would have been rude if they did ask and I probably would have dodged the question.  

Post # 11
Member
10288 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2011

My Future Mother-In-Law has asked about a number of wedding costs and I don’t have a problem with it. I would be curious if I were in her shoes.

I dont really have a problem telling anyone how much stuff is costing since we’re getting really great deals on most aspects of our wedding. I’m actually proud of myself for doing the homework, shopping around and negotiating so I want to share my bargains with others. 

Post # 12
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

My inlaws didn’t ask about money. But I don’t think I’d care if they did. Right after we got engaged I was kind of freaking out about budget, and since my Mother-In-Law helped plan her other son’s wedding she still had everything saved. She went over what they spent on everything and gave me tips on how to save money. I know that they trust us and how we spend our money, so if she were curious for some reason I don’t think it would be in a judgy kind of way.

Post # 13
Member
3982 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Since they are paying for a big portion of the wedding they kinda need to know… My parents don’t care how much something cost unless they have to pay for it.

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