I’m in a similar situation, so I know how you feel. My boyfriend & I have been dating for over 4 & 1/2 years (but we were friends for a couple years before), we’re both 24, & still not engaged. At this point, I’m ok with not being engaged, but there was a time where I was seriously predicting it and was very impatient on waiting for it. Probably right around the time that we had been dating for 3 years, I began to expect an engagement soon. This was also a time that his sister, who was only 20 at the time, got married & in my opinion didn’t need to be getting married (for a variety of reasons, immaturity, age, they had just been broken up not long before, etc.). And it seemed like everyone around us was getting engaged, including lots of people that had been dating for a much shorter time. I brought up engagement pretty regularly cause I was so impatient about it at the time. Then about a year ago, we were both moving from one city to another(we have not & will not live together before marriage, fyi), & he went & bought a house without even getting my opinion on it at all. And so I thought, if he had any intentions on proposing any time soon he would have asked my opinion of the house or waited until we got engaged. I also thought there was no way he’d be able to afford a ring anytime soon, so I reaeeallly resented him buying a house. So I knew at that point an engagement wasn’t coming anytime soon & I was absolutely crushed. That happening & not getting engaged really changed things for me. Any butterflies that were still there left. I still loved him, but I was resentful about the whole house situation. It’s been about a year since then & my feelings & emotions towards our relationship have been so crazy during this past year. I honestly considered breaking up with him on multiple occasions but my heart felt like breaking anytime I really thought about it so I never went through with it. Now I’m glad we didn’t get engaged earlier. This year of crazy emotions has given me time to think about what I really want in life & to set some stuff straight with him. And, we’re older but both still in school(I should be graduating hopefully within a year) so it might be best that we weren’t already engaged. So, now we’re working on any little things that might bother me about him or our relationship & I feel a whole lot better about it. I hoonestly think that now I am more ready for an engagement & getting married. And now, I’m pretty positive he’s ready to get engaged, so the timing has worked out ok. ….I wish there were still the butterflies & lovey dovey feelings, but there barely are. But, I know that I love him with all my heart & that beats out butterflies.
Anyways, kudos to anyone who acutally read all of that! So basically, I think what you’re feeling is completely normal. And it’s completely normal to feel stressed about school & to have school stress make other things feel more stressful. And, I personally think you’ll be just fine without going to see a counselor (not that there’s anything wrong with that or that I’m opposed to that). College is stressful & relationships can be stressful so when you put them together, there’s bound to be stress. I also think it’s completely normal to have lost the butterflies after being together so long. One thing that kind of helps to bring that magical feeling back for me is if we do something we used to do when we were first dating & listen to songs that we listened to a lot then (music’s kind of important to us). And, if I think about special times we’ve had together, good dates we’ve been on, or funny things that have happened to us, that also helps bring back some butterflies.
Good luck with it all! Just remember, whatever’s meant to be will be & it will all work out in the end! And, I’m a Christian, so I always remember that I will not know & may not understand God’s timing, but He knows what He’s doing, so I just have to trust Him!