(Closed) dad invited people I don’t even know…but he’s paying

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
1391 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

What kind of wedding are you having? I don’t see it as a fight worth having unless you have personal issues with any of those 20 people.

Post # 4
1303 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Be thankful…and hope these extra people bring gifts.  ::Shrugs::

Post # 5
1418 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

If your venue can handle that many additional people, I would graciously accept the money and add the extra 20 people onto the list.  It sounds almost like he gave you additional money under the expectation that these other people would be invited – since the cheque and the list came together.  Unless you have a space problem though, I wouldn’t fight it.

Post # 6
4137 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

unless you’re trying to keep the wedding very small, let it go. they probably won’t come if they don’t know you, and it will make your dad happy to invite them.

Post # 8
1986 posts
Buzzing bee

If he’s paying, then yes, he gets to invite.

Post # 9
2739 posts
Sugar bee

So there are 10 ppl on the list that you don’t know? Hmmm.., except you are having a 20 person ceremony, I’d cash that check so fast BOA wouldn’t know what hit them Laughing

Post # 10
3563 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

@Aubergold: Haha EXACTLY THIS. 🙂 Just be glad it was only 10 strangers!

Post # 11
659 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2011

i’d just be thankful he’s giving you money for the day and not make an issue of it UNLESS those people you don’t know are taking up the spots on the list of people you do know/want there.

My Future Mother-In-Law isn’t contributing jack (and more and more, it’s turning in to “I wasn’t married in this country so I don’t know the traditions!!!!” gimme  break).  Not contributing jack and inviting 11 friends.  11.  Friends.  In a wedding of 80 guests.  My parents have 5 family friends.  5.  And they are paying for everything we aren’t able to cover.  So put it in to perspective and avoid confrontation unless absolutely necessary (i.e. you need the spots for other relatives/guests). 

Post # 12
3761 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I think its probably best to be grateful for the money and support your father is providing.  I think you should have a discussion with him about the 20 people on the list.  Say, you appreciate the money and want to include people he feels important. 

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