(Closed) Dad: You’re not giving me away

posted 9 years ago in Ceremony
Post # 31
Member
963 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

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JumpingJacks : i didnt want my Fiance asking my parents for “permission” and  i was going to walk myself cause me and dad arent close and i didnt want to be given away.. but in the last 6 months my relationship with my mother has significantly chanhed/deteriorated (they are divorced 17 yeats now) and throughout this change I felt really alone (except for FI) and my dad has really stepped up a lot he has been very supportive and much more present/involved… he asked me if I would like to be escorted down the aisle and I said yes (to my own surprise). So i dont look at it as being given away .. more of a chivalrous thing he is doing by escorting me down the aisle. 🙂 

Fi didnt ask for my hand. The officiant is not gonna say “who gives this woman…” and will not ask “if anyone has anything to say speak now or forever hold you peace” either. My dad is not giving me away I am 32 y.o.ffs. He is escorting me down the aisle.

Post # 32
Member
1270 posts
Bumble bee

I’m gonna have my dad walk me, mostly just because I know it will mean a lot to him and he is already kinda upset that we’re not having a big wedding and inviting all the family (plus, I don’t think we’re doing daughter/father and mother/son dances). I don’t read into the traditions too much, but I can understand why a woman would feel strongly about being “given away”, as if she were an object. Anyone who has the mentality that a mature, responsible woman needs to be given away would do well to make sure the groom’s mommy walks him down the aisle, as well.

Post # 33
Member
210 posts
Helper bee

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mrsbacon :  is this a necessary part of the ceremony wording where you are??! 

Post # 34
Member
903 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I’m walking alone.  My dad isn’t in the picture (isn’t invited to the wedding).  My step-dad and I are not particularly close.  I wanted my grandma to walk me but her health isn’t the best and the doctor told her she couldn’t travel.  My mom asked what I would do if my grandma couldn’t come and I said, “do it myself.”

My mom was a little hurt that I didn’t ask her but walking myself is just something I want to do.  My dad wasn’t there for a lot of “big” moments in my life and I’ve realized that I’m stronger because of it and I’m strong enough to do this by myself (as long as I don’t trip and fall).  My mom understands after I explained my reasoning.  My mom is going to meet me at the end of the aisle to “give me away.”

Post # 35
Member
14 posts
Newbee

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mrsbacon :  I teared up. What an amazing dad. You are very lucky.

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