Post # 1
I’m starting to realize (I say this tongue in cheek, because I’ve always know this) that I’m the planner in the relationship. I plan our date nights, I plan our vacations, I make 90% of the suggestions for activites, etc.
WHY I would be upset at this is beyond me (and quite ridiculous)… especially because I’m usually happier when I plan things…. but I do find myself annoyed from time to time and wishing that Darling Husband would do more planning. (I’ve asked him to – told him it’s important – and he does make an effort – but I feel like it’s just easier for me to say: hey, take me to “X” spot -and he does – so, it’s a win-win. Not a very romantic method, but it accomplishes the task). 🙂
But, it made me curious, if I’m all alone or if others in the hives are the “Planners” in their relationship.
Post # 3
@oracle: Hey, not sure if you’re still on here but I was doing a search for the same issue when I found your post. I love my hubby, he’s awesome and there’s nothing he wouldn’t do for me, but would it kill him to plan a dinner, a movie, a show, a picnic, something?!! In his defence, I don’t work and we don’t have kids so I do have the free time. Plus, as he just said, he’s only lived in our city a year while I’ve lived here 13 years so I know the area better. Irregardless, if you’ve found a way to get him to be a more active participant, let me know.
Post # 4
I am usually the planner, too. On a rare occasion (usually just Valentines day and my birthday) I will let dh know I would like him to plan an evening for us and he’ll do it but I still have to give him ideas on restaurants/movies/etc to choose from.
Post # 5
@cerenatee: hey there – yep, I am still on here 🙂 (it’s a bit addictive, you know!). What I’ve come to realize is he will make suggestions but things aren’t planned out in the grand scale that I want… but he does make them (the suggestions). He is usually always up to going along with whatever I want to do (which I took for granted!) and I realized that I’m just better at coming up with ideas (and I’m also the one who wants to variety!). 🙂 So, to that end – I guess I just got over the romantic notion of it all and am enjoying the man I married… the one that wants me to be happy and the one that is willing to go along with all my crazy ideas/plans. Sure – some days, it would be great for him to come up with the ideas… 🙂 but it doesn’t bother me or make me feel like something is lacking in the relationship. It’s more of a realization of who HE is vs. how he feels about me or his commitment to the relationship.
Post # 6
I totally know where you are coming from. I told Fiance if i never planned anything, we would NEVER go out and do anything fun or different. I basically have to tell him “plan a date night” or he wont do it.
I think its a guy thing. He has no ideas or time to ponder stuff like that. He thinks i do a better job anyway.
Post # 7
- Wedding: June 2012 - Franklin Plaza
Glad this post was pulled up! 🙂 Darling Husband and I are the same way… I’m always planning, planning, planning. Most of the time I don’t mind as I enjoy it, but c’mon every once in a while it’s nice to sit back and have someone else plan a date for you. Right?!
So, when my birthday rolled around and Darling Husband asked me what I wanted I told him all I wanted was for him to plan a bona fide date night for us. It’s supposedly in the works right now and if all goes well I might ask for the same “gift” for all future holidays! 😀
Post # 8
I AM THE PLANNER HANDS DOWN. Do I get annoyed sometimes that he doesn’t? Yes. However would I be annoyed if I didn’t plan? Yes. So frustrating.
We are planning I am planning a trip for us to Europe at the moment. All airfare including intereuropean flights and lodging has been booked by me. If I waited for Darling Husband to do it it would never get done. Or we would be staying at a dingy hostel. No thanks.