(Closed) Date poaching, or am I just a b*tch?

posted 9 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 17
Member
2567 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

You have to learn to let this one go. Some folks will choose your wedding if they can only do one; some will choose the other wedding; some will go to both, and some will go to neither.  That’s just life.  I don’t consider your date as having been “poached”. .

Post # 18
Member
6533 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2014

I get being upset about friends missing your missing because of this other one. But there’s nothing you can do about it so you kind of have to let it go. It sucks but try to think of it this way… You will see those friends at the other wedding, and since you’re only a normal guest at that one you will have more time to socialize with them!

Post # 19
Member
1477 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@MrsWBS:  “In my opinion, if someone doesn’t find my wedding important enough to attend, then I don’t really want them there anyways.”

+1.

Yeah it sucks that they are going to have to pick one over the other, but it’s out of your control.

Post # 20
Member
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

You haven’t sent your save the dates out yet? That’s a little late IMO.

Post # 21
Member
5229 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

You’re overreacting. I’m not sure I’d say you’re being a bitch, but your definitely being selfish. Since you are planning a wedding yourself, I’m sure you realize how hard it can be to choose a date the fits your own needs and accommodates your nearest and dearest (and is available with your vendors). If you’ve had your date set for so long, you unfortunately put yourself in a bad position by waiting to send your Save-the-Dates. Hopefully, it won’t matter.

I know for me, if I had two Out of Town weddings to go to in the same year, I could only budget for one, whether they were both in the same month or 6 monts apart, so even if your friend’s date was further removed from yours, I’d still have to prioritize.

Post # 22
Member
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@mrsSonthebeach:  +1

 

OP, look at it this way, if they don’t come that  is less people you have to pay for and you will still get a gift. If people really want to be there, they will.

Post # 24
Member
1071 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

Life is full of disappointments and in the long run I think you’ll find that this is a rather minor one.

Post # 26
Member
1946 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Honestly, just because I get a Save the Date doesn’t mean I actually save the date.  People are either going to come or they aren’t.  On that day you won’t care.

Post # 27
Member
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@oneofthesethings:  +1

View original reply
@ZChick17:  I just said it was my opinion they should have been sent eariler. Mine were sent a year in advance and my invitations went out 12 weeks before.That is just me but I plan ahead. I am having a morning wedding and since they aren’t very common here, I wanted my out of town guests to know so they weren’t thinking it will be a normal evening wedding. No matter what, you can’t have everyone come who you invited, and that is fine with me.

Post # 30
Member
3330 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would be a little upset, too. That sucks :(. Hopefully your friends have already planned to attend yours and won’t just switch to his! 

Post # 31
Member
538 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

@ZChick17:  I only mentioned because you brought it up. like I said that was my opinion to each his own no need to get upset

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