Dating someone new who has a lot of female friends

posted 1 year ago in Relationships
Post # 76
Member
1434 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2019 - City, State

 

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andromeda99 :  Yeah, we are engaged, but in order to get engaged, those type of feelings have to come about or be present because they spur you to make your commitments. I probably felt that way about him and he about me from day one.

And it’s probably why you feel some type of way about this with your guy. 

I’m not the type of person who trusts stuff like this, so I might not be the best person to advise you. I wouldn’t feel comfortable, and I’d probably not be dating him because of all these female friends. That’s just me. 

You have to decide if you want a Mr. Right Now or a Mr. Right, though. And as I said in another post, it’s easier to kick someone to the curb over things at the beginning than it is once feelings get involved. The last thing I want you to do to yourself is talk yourself into putting up with it just to be with “Mr. Right Now.” If he’s only Mr. Right Now, at what point is he going to be “Mr. Back Then?”

Will you date him until you meet someone else? Until he meets someone else? Until you just can’t take the females hovering around anymore? Until what? And then you have to start all over once he goes from Mr. Right Now to Mr. Back Then. So in my view, you might as well cut him now if he’s only Mr. Right Now. And what will make him “Mr. Right Forever?”

I hope I’m making sense. 

If you don’t want anything serious, then I wouldn’t worry about any of this at all. But I never dated a Mr. Right Now. I either went on two or three dates with a guy and that’s it, or he was a long-term boyfriend, who yeah, I was considering a life with.

So what is he to you? Can you really be okay with him continually taking these trips and taking them without you if you stay with him? Do you like being in this girl’s shadow? Because, from the sound of it, his friends can NOT stop talking about her. Or is it that you can’t stop asking about her?

I’m still gonna be a stickler on that cooler lie. there was just too much smoke in that one. For me, he can give no adequate answer because there was just no reason in the world to lie as deeply as he did by saying he didn’t even know anyone by that name when his “best friend” is named that.

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