(Closed) Day 2 and already stressed out!

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
553 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

I know what you mean. We had the same dilemma. I don’t encourage this arrangement, but it can definitely be done tastefully and non-showy, whereas people will understand, and it sounds like you are going to nail that. 

The first think you are doing RIGHT is you are only having immediate family, and no friends, no wedding party, etc. Guests will not think anything of it because they know they weren’t excluded for any other reason other than their lack of relation to you.

If your mom starts pressuring you like this you and your honey might consider just having a wedding between the two of you, and no one else except the officient and witness, and have the reception for the entire family and all your friends. My fiance’s father and step-mom did this when they got married 25 years ago. They loved it and even encouraged us to do the same thing. 

The wedding vows are what it is all about. No one else has to be there for you two to commit yourselves to each other. Your vows are to each other, and if you want that to be an intimate affair, then that is the way you need to do it!

Post # 4
Member
155 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I see nothing wrong with having an intimate ceremony with immediate family only followed by a reception with extended family and friends.

In fact, my Fiance and I just received and invitation to our friends’ wedding in May that is just that. You want to know what my Fiance said (jokingly of course) “Great, thanks for inviting us just to the fun part!”

You are well within your rights and etiquette to have only your immediate family at the ceremony and the other guests at the reception only. I doubt anyone will base their decision on whether or not to come on this fact and, even if some people do, it will only be a very small percentage of your invite list. Definitely not something you guys  should change your vision of your big day over.

Post # 5
Member
60 posts
Worker bee

All I want to say is on day 2 I was a wreck. It gets better. Just remember to breathe. I have only been at this a couple weeks and it already way better. 🙂 I promise!

Post # 6
Member
6 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2013

First off, you can do whatever you want.  I had only parents, siblings, and grandparents at my first wedding.  Only one grandparent was able to make it because of health reasons and she doesn’t drive so one aunt had to bring her.  Luckily I only had one sister and he only had one brother so Maid/Matron of Honor and Bridesmaid or Best Man was an easy choice.  We had a reception for family and friends afterwards.  Sure, some of my aunts probably would have liked to watch the ceremony but I’m guessing most people were perfectly happy with not having to worry about finding the church, keeping kids quiet, and then driving 40 minutes to the reception site.  And I’m pretty sure people aren’t still pissed about how we did things even if they were disappointed at the time.  They will get over it…I promise!

The topic ‘Day 2 and already stressed out!’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors