"Day Without a Woman"

posted 3 years ago in The Lounge
Post # 151
Member
2018 posts
Buzzing bee

MrsMellyBean :  The math behind the 77 cents arguement doesn’t add up. Based on the few details in the link you sent, it sounded like the math was done in the same way, which would make it false. If you say, men on average make $8 an hour but women make 7.87, you’re not accounting for different job types and choices.

Choices aren’t a social construct. 90 something % of early education majors are female. I don’t remember ever hearing that boys shouldn’t be teachers. Even if (which I don’t agree with) women are told as girls to be in lower paying professions, women are totally capable of looking at annual salaries of different positoins and making a choice which path to pursue. Early education majors are listed on one of the lowest paying majors. If you chose to pursue that major, you did so understanding what the financial payout was most likely going to be. I don’t think that’s because we give girls barbies and boys baseballs at a young age.

Post # 152
Member
2018 posts
Buzzing bee

MrsMellyBean :  There are quite a few companies in the US who have equal maternity and paternity policies. At my company, a man can take off just as much time as women. Any program offered is available equally to both men and women. Not just maternity and paternity- things like taking professional development leave, sick parent leave, etc.

I’ve heard HR say that these policies are mostly utilized by women. Again, women are choosing to make this decision. Sick parents, sick kids could all be taken care of by men as well. But I remember being a kid, and I would have preferred my mom to stay home with me instead of my dad 🙂 maybe other households had different experiences.

Post # 153
Member
1607 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

amanda1988 :  technically it’s not the same for men and women for mat leave. Approx three months is true mat leave and just for women who have given birth. The other approx nine months is called parental leave and be taken by either men or women within the first year of their child’s life or within the first nine months of adopting a baby. The mom and dad can split this time however they want. 

And while it’s true the men may make more, I think saying that’s the reason why moms are usually the ones staying home is simplifying the issue, IMO. For many people I know, the issue is not so much as who makes the most money but who is the best person to stay home with the baby. For mothers who want to exclusively breastfeed, that would be the mom. There’s also the social stigma or assumption that the mom will stay home and the dad will work. 

Post # 154
Member
227 posts
Helper bee

FutureDrAtkins :  I actually read several articles today that Ivanka Trump’s clothing line is recording record sales for the past few weeks, since Nordstrom dropped her. (some figures report over a 300% increase)

I personally don’t lean one way or another regarding her clothing brand, but I just wanted to mention that.

Post # 155
Member
816 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

MrsMellyBean :  the issue can be more complex though.  Generally speaking it is recommended for women to breastfeed infants due to its increased benefits particularly in regards to infection, tolerance and reflux reduction and even sids reduction (not going into the more controversial bits).  For dairy intolerant infants breastfeeding is almost a given partcularly if your only choice is the very expensive alimentum formula.  THis means that pat leave may not even be a viable choice and women need to stay back and take care of infants.

This being said it’s not easy on males either, as some industries have no tolerance for their male employees to spend anytime taking care of a sick child in essence questioning their loyalty and drive.  This has nothing to do with their capability of finishing and completing assignments as many do so but if they even insinuate they need to go home because their kid is ill other men look down on them which lead to men providing other excuses.  

Post # 156
Member
1671 posts
Bumble bee

italianbride0508 :  I’m not going to argue with you anymore because I’m not going to change your mind. It’s great that you think that everything you do is 100% your choice with absolutely no outside influence, but I think if you really looked into it, you’d realize that’s not the case. 

chocochai :  I’m the one that brought up paternity leave in Canada. I didn’t say that was the only reason, I said it was ONE reason, and a very big one at that. I agree that there is a stigma associated with stay at home dads and that’s wrong to me!

Post # 157
Member
1229 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Didn’t take today off.  Worked ’til 3 AM last night.  Kicked off the day by going to see a patient with a (male) trainee.  Patient and family addressed the male trainee as “Dr.” and me as “Hon.”  I’m his boss.  Tell me sexism isn’t alive and well…

Post # 158
Member
1671 posts
Bumble bee

Ettalie :  If you look back at my post, it says it’s one reason, not the only reason, but for our household, it’s a big one. 

Post # 159
Member
816 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

MrsMellyBean :  oh I’m sure it is as it is for many people.  Just wanted to mention there were also other reasons which affect that decision so it’s not like we choose to stay home because we want the “easy job of taking care of an infant and not be a working professional” (which is a huge joke I find my job far easier than taking care of a crying infant that can’t communicate and wakes up ever 20-40 min demanding your complete and utter attention damn your pee break!!!), sometimes for the good of society it is the best choice for everyone employers included (can’t imagine having to pump every two hours at work!).

Post # 160
Member
7418 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

For those who think women have all the same career opportunities as men, or that giving a little girl a barbie while a little boy gets legos is no big deal, there are some eye-opening reading materials for you.

https://www.nytimes.com/2015/02/07/upshot/how-elementary-school-teachers-biases-can-discourage-girls-from-math-and-science.html?_r=0  <– the unconcious bias for girls to be good at “girl things” and boys to be good at “boy things” starts as early as kindergarten (but could also be imprinted in the home, much earlier).

http://www.inspiringscience.eu/news/girls-discouraged-stem <– another study that says basically the same thing

http://www.sciencemag.org/careers/2016/07/low-math-confidence-discourages-female-students-pursuing-stem-disciplines <– It’s not that women are not good at maths and sciences; it’s that they don’t believe they are good.

https://hbr.org/2014/08/why-women-dont-apply-for-jobs-unless-theyre-100-qualified <– eye-opening reading about how we women have much higher standards as to which jobs we will apply for, compared to male counterparts. So we won’t even try for that promotion, even though we could probably get it.

Don’t believe that last one? Take a minute and think about the last time you went job hunting and how many jobs you didn’t try for, because the ad listed 10 skills and you only had 7 of them.  And think about how long it takes you to get ready to go to the office in the morning, compared to your male counterparts or your spouse/fi (assuming you are both white collar workers).

If you can’t believe that circumstances play a role in your career trajectory, then you’re part of “the system” and part of why women are striking today. 

jimonabee89 :  A few weeks of good sales due to a massive uptick in free publicity is too small a data point to consider a trend.  Wait 6 months and see if the increased sales are consistent or if they flatten back down to their earlier levels. 

Post # 161
Member
1671 posts
Bumble bee

Ettalie :  absolutely! I definitely don’t think it’s an easy job. I’m going to be staying home with our babe for a year  starting in August- I’m both ecstatic and terrified haha.

Post # 162
Member
816 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Horseradish :  gender stereotypes are huge.  I experienced a lot of it as a kid including not being able to learn to weld because my father said “it’s dangerous and girls should not play with it” but he had no qualms teaching the boys … and that’s one of many.  I’m lucky I got into engineering and that was thanks to an amazing school teacher who told me I’d do great in that field because to my mom “calculus and physics are too hard” and my father ever encouraged a girl to enter the field.

Post # 163
Member
5046 posts
Bee Keeper

Whirlwind03 :  That’s horrifying. I haaaate being called hon, sweetie, etc. Ugh. 

Post # 164
Member
1607 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

MrsMellyBean :  stigma is really bad for that and even something I’m struggling with even though logically I know it’s dumb. I make more than my husband so it would make financial sense if he took more time off with any future kids.  But the idea that moms stay home while dads work is so ingrained in my way of thinking, that I’m having a hard time being ok with him potentially staying at home in the future. We will figure out what works best for us, but i wish that stigma wasn’t so ingrained so I could a more unbiased decision. 

Post # 165
Member
5365 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2016

Well judging by the line at my local HomeGoods, all the rich women in my area decided to shop today in objection.

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