sleepymelis : I have only had the healthshare since January. The plan was to sign up for it, get pregnant, make all the deductible payments to my midwife over time and then have them cover the rest. All of these giant medical bills were unexpected of course, so I had to navigate this for the first time. I definitely wish we’d had the deductible amount set aside before we started trying :/
beevincent18 : yes I spent many hours on the phone with them trying to navigate things. Part of why this was so hard for us was because I hadn’t gotten my ID card from them in the mail yet, so I had nothing to give the offices when I was trying to explain how it worked. So far they’ve been awesome at answering my questions and working with me to understand everything.
ColoradoGirl : yeah it all started when the receptionist at the doctors office heard the word “healthshare.” It’s like she immediately just tuned out anything I had to say about it. The company I have is not a typical healthshare, it’s most like insurance in that the offices are supposed to send the bills to them, they negotiate a price for you, and they pay the hospital. But the doctors office kept telling the surgery center and anesthesia office thst I was a self pay client, and had no insurance. So it kept messing up what quotes I was getting and how much I had to pay ahead of time.
So i did end up grtting the D&C. I spent 3.5 hours on the phone this morning trying to get things arranged. I just so happened to call my healthshare with a few questions, and discovered at 9am that the doctors office hadn’t submitted ANY of the prenotification paperwork and the surgery was not approved at that point. I called the doctors office as soon as I learned that, and the receptionist literally gasped in horror. They faxed everything in urgently, and they were working on it, but I still had no idea if it was going to be approved or not. Everyone kept telling me to keep continuing as if it would happen, so I kept fasting and preparing to leave. Literally ten mins before we got to the hospital, we got the call that paperwork had gone through and we were approved for surgery. I was shaking with the release of that stress.
For anyone that reads this that wants to know my experience: I got to the surgery center and we filled out all the paperwork. They called me back quickly, and I was put in a big room with lots of beds with individual curtains around them. The nurse weighed me, and I changed into a gown. She asked me lots of questions about allergies and medical history, all the presurgery stuff. She gave me a shot of lidocaine to numb my hand and placed an IV. Then once I was all prepped they let my husband and two year old come back to see me. I cried when I saw them, I was so happy they let them come back before I went in. My two year old was covered in Oreos and orange dorito dust (we brought the verrrrry high powered snacks as complete and utter bribes to wait quietly haha) and my husband was wiping him off. My son got a wipe out of the bag and handed it to me saying “ be better mama!” So I could dry my tears 😭 I cried some more of course, he is so sweet. and asked my husband to come back as soon as he could. The doctor and anesthesiologist arrived, and explained what they were going to do. I was able to ask lots of questions about the anesthesia, which was a main worry of mine because I’d never had it before. She answered all my questions and was really nice.
Then they gave me a shot into the IV of an anti anxiety drug. once it kicked in my husband and son went back to the waiting room and they wheeeled me into the operating room. It kicked in right away, and I felt physically drunk. Like kind of wobbly, and my eyes weren’t focusing. But I was DEFINITELY still anxious. I was crying the entire time they wheeled me in, and idk I’d that was unusual or not but they kept reassuring me and telling me I was okay and being taken care of. They had me scoot off the gurney onto the table, it was hard to remember what the room looked like but I remember a bed and two big circular lights above me. Without much warning (or maybe they did but I don’t remember) they gave me the anesthesia into my IV and I was out instantly. I didn’t feel myself slipping away like I was worried. And they didn’t have to Intubate me. The procedure was only about 20 mins, for them to prep and clean me and do it. I have no memory of it whatsoever.
When i I woke up, I was back in the big room with all the curtained off beds. Almost as soon as I felt like I opened my eyes (I have no idea how long it took me to wake up though), the nurse asked if I wanted my family and I said yes and started crying again. I was so afraid of waking up alone without them but it wasn’t more than a minute and they were there. They got to be with me while I woke up. Which wasn’t too long, I’d say no more than ten mins I felt kind of weird and outnof it, but still fully aware. I was never nauseous from the anesthesia. I asked my husband a few times “when did you get here?” But nothing like the anesthesia videos I’ve seen of people saying funny things. They had me lay there about a half an hour or so, taking my blood pressure and monitoring my vitals to make sure I was stable. Then the nurse helped take out the IV, and I got changed into my clothes. My husband went out to get the car and they wheeeled me outside and helped me in. Overall, we got there at 11 to do paperwork, they did the procedure at 12, and I was in the car on the way home by 2pm.
I was tired, and cramping a bit when I got home. Not severe contraction-like cramps, nothing sharp. Just like the low constant ache of the first day of your period. I had some Greek yogurt, and went to bed. I slept for about 2.5 hours and when I got up I was hungry enough to eat some Pho and have some bubble tea for dessert. One of my prescriptions was for methargyn (??) or something like that, that’s supposed to contract the uterus back to normal size and reduce bleeding. An hour or so after I took it, the cramps intensified a bit more, nothing unbearable at all just enough to make me want to lay down and stop walking around. I didn’t need to take the codeine or ibuprofen, but my husband convinced me to just take the ibuprofen for a day just so I could get some good sleep. It helped a lot. I’m bleeding, but nothing more than a medium/light period and it’s exaxtly like how it was after having my son. A few clots but nothing scary or traumatizing. Overall, while I was still fairly terrified, everything went okay.
We’re going to have a little naming and goodbye ceremony on Friday, to make her a person, and to get closure. The D&C is good for physical healing but I felt I needed more for my emotions, to wrap things up and say goodbye. I’d like to get a ring with her birthstone too, of her EDD month. Or something similar to remember her by. Maybe something I wear daily, or maybe just a little token that I can hold sometimes and cry. I feel relieved that the threat of a traumatic physical miscarriage is gone, and she’s no longer in there, not living. But I feel empty, and lonely, and I miss her.