(Closed) Dealing with a Groomzilla!

posted 4 years ago in Grooms/men
Post # 3
Member
12259 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’m not sure you have a Groomzilla on your hands… I think you have a guy getting puppeted by Mama!

Post # 5
Member
1376 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

As for the first issue: can you take the money you’ll save by not renting a venue, and hire a coordinator to handle all the logistics for you? You don’t need to get full planning so it shouldn’t  be very expensive – your total expenses for venue should still be less than going to an outside one.

as for the ceremony – even when people aren’t religious, cultural traditions can be really important. I think you need to have a serious talk with him and iron out what you will include, and what you won’t. And then talk about how you will respond to suggestions & questions about it together as a united front. 

Good luck! My FI is in a doctoral program so I know how frustrating it can be to be the one doing all the work for something he wants. I just try to remind myself that it is important it be his wedding too, and he is working hard for our future, so I can’t hold that against him!

Post # 6
Member
2534 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

@BrandNewBride:  +1

Yeah, I think his issues aren’t with the wedding as much as they are with his ability to make a choice for himself. Think this is something he really needs to work on before you two tie the knot!

Don’t think of addressing these things as being “confrontational.”
There will be plenty of issues in your marriage, just because you have a beef doesn’t automatically make it a confrontation.
Think of this as addressing a problem pre-emptively – because if you don’t start now, you BET this will become a MAJOR issue down the line (especially if you keep all this bottled in – that’s not fair to you in any relationship).

Your FI should be willing to listen and to understand – don’t even worry about comprimising right now, because he needs to understand that what you want for this wedding (and your marriage!!) is also important – equally important.

Post # 8
Member
1413 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@nber0815:  Didn’t his parents buy your engagement ring?  I’d assume they are driving things at this point.

Post # 9
Member
526 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

I think you really need to push him on the venue.  Is it possible to have the ceremony at his parents’ place and then go to a reception elsewhere?  

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