- 7 years ago
- Wedding: October 2010
We’ve been married a little over 6 months now, and my husband’s lack of motivation and drive is really starting to affect me. I feel like if I don’t do things myself, that things won’t get done, and I’m incredibly disappointed that my husband really has no aspirations in life anymore.
I’m a very self-motivated person. Last summer I finished my certification to become a pharmacy technician, and this summer I’m heading back to school to start the long process of becoming a pharmacist. My husband on the other hand is sitting on a half-finished bachelors degree, hasn’t enrolled in school in almost two years now, with no motivation to finish what he’s started. He’s an incredibly smart person, but doesn’t apply himself.
I’ve also recently taken charge of my health, changing my diet and exercising regularly. So far I’ve lost 20 lbs, recently ran a 5k, and am currently training to run a half-marathon at the end of summer. My husband is only 28 and already plagued with a number of health problems, largely affected by his obesity. I’ve been nagging him for over 6 months now to find a new doctor and make an appointment, but he’s taken no steps towards doing anything for his health, and I worry that I’m going to be a widow before I’m 40. I’ve also been trying to get him to eat better and come to the gym with me, but that’s not working out very well either- I can maybe get him to come once a week, if I’m lucky.
He also has no interest in going out and doing social things. He never calls or visits his best friend or his godson, and won’t take me out on dates, or go out and do activities with me. I have to plan all of our social activities, which occasionally he’ll begrudgingly attend. Frankly, all he does is go to work, then come home and sit in his chair and watch TV or play video games. I’m really disappointed that the my intelligent, interesting husband has disappeared, and has been replaced by this unmotivated sloth of a man.
He isn’t even motivated to have sex. I’m almost always the one to initiate, and half of the time he’ll either turn me down, or say “later” which almost always doesn’t happen. I’m getting to the point where I just don’t even want to bother trying, which is really frusterating me, since at that point that basically makes us roommates rather then spouses.
I’m tired of nagging, I’m tired of acting like his mother. I just want him to do something with his life, and work towards being a better person, instead of lazily sitting at home watching TV. It’s starting to really frustrate me, and I don’t enjoy spending time with him as much anymore because of it.