(Closed) Dealing with negativity?

posted 4 years ago in 20 Something
Post # 2
Member
1015 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

I definitely don’t think 24 is too young!  It sounds like your coworker is a grump who’s not happy with his own life so he wants to rain on your parade.  And you can’t travel or do anything fun after you’re married? What the heck?! I don’t really have any advice besides try to tune it out and enjoy this very special and sweet time with your fiance.

Post # 4
Member
64 posts
Worker bee

Wow!! Crappy comments are awful, sorry you’re going through that bee. ๐Ÿ™ I too was a ‘young’ bride. But around here, I was considered OLD at 25. I should have had atleast 2 kids by then. Sigh. 
You ca power through it!! I just either shrug it off and say thank you for the advice or snap a crabby comment at them… depends who it is and how frustrated I am lol.

Post # 5
Member
2598 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

Just be all “stepford wife”–smile and say some version of, “Well, nice talkin’ to you!” and move on. It’s pointless to bother with these kinds of people. 

Post # 6
Member
59 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

I got so many negative comments! Everyone basically told me I couldn’t enjoy life, I would hate making that decision…blah blah blah. Even my own mother told me I was too young. And my grandma told her to talk me out of it. No one was on board. We are two months away now, and everyone is so excited! I think a lot of it was fear and shock, and everyone got over it after some time. I was 18 when I got engaged, and I will be 20 when I not only become a wife, but also a step mom. I am making the greatest decision of my life, and I am confident in that. If you feel the same way, just don’t let anyone bring you down. This is your special moment, and anyone who has something negative to say about it can go elsewhere!

Post # 7
Member
9521 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

This would happen at any age. At 35 a coworker told me “I’m surprised you found someone so old. You should have married younger”. Thanks buddy. You can’t fix stupid. Just brush it off

Post # 8
Member
11389 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

View original reply
theatrejulia:  omg what a dumba$$ people say the most ignorant things! 

She’s right, OP. Sadly for the rest of your life, people with no filter I’ll be dropping judgment on pretty much everything you do. Best to learn now that their feelings about your life are not your problem. 

Post # 9
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

View original reply
xokatiebee:  Opinions are like…elbows;) Everyone has one! I like to challenge where comments like that are really coming from….” Oh did you get married too young and regret it?” lol

Post # 10
Member
9521 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

View original reply
seejanebee:  …I always heard it as buttholes, every one has one and they all stink.

Post # 11
Member
1253 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

View original reply
theatrejulia:  Haha me too but I thought I’d try out a less ‘offensive’ version. I like ones that you can tell any audience. 

Post # 12
Member
3311 posts
Sugar bee

I let the negative comments roll off me like water off a ducks back… 

The best worst comment I received was “You’re engaged!! Congratulations on making the worst decision of your life!” I COULD have taken a stab at the guy and his broken engagement… but what I did was ignore the comment, and changed the topic. I don’t care if it made me look rude – his comment was uncalled for.

Post # 13
Member
613 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2017

View original reply
xokatiebee:  Im sorry this happened to you :/ Trust me I can relate. When I got enagaged I had a co-worker tell me that I should have made him spring for a solitaire because its worth more when we divorce and that by me accepting the ring it was equal to my Fiance buying me as his property… So lovely right?

I have learned to just brush it off. The way I look at it is that I am happy and confident in my choice, and if others feel the need to judge or comment, then they must not be too happy in theirs. It’s their problem not yours! Don’t take it personally ๐Ÿ™‚

Post # 14
Member
10 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: November 2016

People always like to stick their noses in other people’s business. Just ignore comments like this and move along. It’s the comments from your loved ones that should matter the most. I’m in a very similar situation being engaged at 21 and will be married at 22 everyone likes to give their opinion on why you shouldn’t be thinking of marriage at this age instead of being happy for you.

Post # 15
Member
1932 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

Always evaluate the source of a negative comment. ALWAYS. Too many people project their experience (positive or negative) onto others. 

 

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