Post # 1
There is an RSVP date on the invitation you received for a f****** reason. That reason is because I NEED TO KNOW IF I’M PAYING FOR YOUR DINNER OR NOT. I understand that sometimes you forget or the invitation gets misplaced, which is why I forgive the full THIRD of you who didn’t send in your card by the necessary date. The vast majority of you responded to my emails/phone calls within 48 hours and let me know if you were or were not coming, and that is fine.
However, the fifteen of you who didn’t bother to respond to any of our emails, calls, texts, smoke signals, etc., have made it to the very top of my s*** list. Do you have any idea how f****** rude you’re being? I need to meet with the caterer TODAY to give them a final headcount, and I DON’T KNOW HOW MANY OF YOU ARE COMING.
Exactly eight of you have told us that you’re going to try to come, but you still need to figure out X, Y, and Z first. The eight of you are at the top of my s*** list. You have known about this stupid wedding for MONTHS, and you’ve had all that time to get your act together. Why the F*** are you coming to me now and saying you don’t know? I’m trying to put together seating charts and talk to the caterers, and you still don’t know if you’re coming??? What the hell? You had your chance to save money for the flights, or decide if you’re going to ask your stupid girlfriend, or work out your stuff for school. Now is NOT the time. At least the other seven people we haven’t heard from just haven’t told us. The eight of you, on the other hand, have told us to WAIT. WTF.
I love you all (well, most of you, at least. I really could not care less if the two of you coworkers of Future Mother-In-Law show up or not), and I would really like to celebrate my marriage with you. That’s why we invited you. However, you’re really starting to piss me off.
Post # 3
ha omg its like I wrote this. My wedding is THIS friday and I had people texting me asking to bring dates and two people cancel last minute after we already paid. Never mind the people I had to track down for RSVPs. People are SO RUDE.
Post # 4
Guests can be so lame sometimes! We had a few RSVP and then not show up at all. And to top that off they weren’t people we wanted there to begin with!
Post # 5
I am so sorry you’re going through this, but I love this letter! I haven’t sent out invitations yet, but I’m sure I’ll have my fair share of issues such as this one when I do.
Post # 6
This is why I recommend to all ladies to do e-mail or text or even Facebook RSVPs. You will waste your money with stamps and your sanity and opinion of your guests. I am a few months post wedding, and I am still floored at some peoples lack of etiquette
Now, hopefully you are just ranting due to pre wedding stress and don’t really mean what you say 😉 Guests are their because you want them to be their on your special day. Things do come up, and money can be tight! We think our wedding is the most important thing, but honestly people really don’t view it like that and also sometimes don’t understand the planning and work that goes into a wedding.
Hang in there!
Post # 7
Count them as no. When they then reply yes, explain that you can not add them to the list. Their lack of response means they are a no.
Post # 8
@Eva Peron: She said she’s also called, e-mailed & texted them… and STILL no response. Money doesn’t really have anything to do with it. If 15 people cannot decide if they are going to a wedding in 2 weeks or not, then I would count them as a big “no”. If they really wanted to come but was for some reason still unsure, they would at least phone you to let you know what is happening and that they are interested in coming. That’s just my opinion.
Post # 9
@Mrs.Firefly1: Yeah, sorry I guess I was a little unclear. I just meant don’t even do normal invites, cause you end up having to do what she is doing now-smoke signal, email etc etc lol
I come from a rough financial upbringing due to my mother being widowed at a young age, so I know what its like to not want to just come out and say you don’t have money or won’t be sure till last minute- its quite humiliating.
I have no idea about her guests, butI agree to just count them as a ” No”
Post # 10
AMEN dear month twin!!
We are chasing potential guests as well, SO AGGRAVATING.
Im so sorry you are stressed with this, and I hope you get your replies very soon.
Post # 11
Great letter! 🙂 Hope it all works out.
Post # 12
Damn! I am soooo not looking forward to dealing with that. People are so rude. I would count them as a no, you’ve given them so many chances.
Post # 13
I can certainly understand the frustration in dealing with this, but at the end of the day, non-response IS a response. If people haven’t responded by the deadline and still choose to ignore your requests via other means, then that right there is a ‘no’. There’s no need to get so upset and angry at having to chase people down; simply consider them a no, and if they change their mind down the road you politely explain that you’re sorry, but you didn’t receive their response in time for the final count and figured they were a no.
It’s going to be okay!!!
Post # 14
@Eva Peron: Totally get where you are coming from. For many years, I struggled with the money gift for a wedding, ect. It was difficult, very difficult. I usually just ended up not going (rsvp’d way in advance) if I really didn’t know the couple (acquaintance) and made it work somehow for my close family and friends! I just wanted to say, I hear ya!!! : )
Post # 15
@KristenGettingMarried: I think what you’re saying is totally logical. However, I personally cannot discount certain guests out of the handful who have not responded that easily. Some of them I know are most likely attending, and I really want them to be there…So even though they are procrastinating and being rude…there are a few who mean a lot to me and I just have to chase them down.
Post # 16
@MissMusic: DATE TWINNN eeek. I get what you all are saying, too.
My old housemates made it to the top of my hit list. That and all the girls I am working with over the next few months on a senior project.
NONE of them RSVP’d. At all. Zip.
I tried chasing down answers but got nothing or vague crap in return.
It’s someone’s wedding for goodness sake…. not a spur of the moment party that may or may not matter to the host! 🙁 It makes me so sad to know so many people are so rude when it comes to this. Getting an invitation means someone really wants you there, I don’t know how people justify not explaining at all or even bothering taking 5 mins to RSVP – even if it’s not in the way they are supposed to.