(Closed) Dear Neighbours… Help

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
1304 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

I wouldn’t do this.  You will unnecessarily stir the pot.

Post # 4
Member
3126 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I think regardless of whether you notify your neighbors or not you will still be restricted by noise laws. I don’t think there is a nice way to say “don’t call the cops”. I would suggest talking to your neighbors face to face, including the ones you aren’t close to, but just to notify them of the event and not discuss parking, noise, etc. Unless they are dense they will get the picture! Just to be on the safe side, make sure your DJ/music is turned off or the volume is lower by the noise curfew (in our area its like 11pm on weekends..totally reasonable).

Post # 6
Member
3692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

@MissTatas:  I agree with this.  The best way to not make the neighbors mad is to not do anything rude to begin with.  

Post # 7
Member
1599 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

I wouldn’t write a note or request that they not call the cops. Are you friendly enough with them that you can mention the wedding next time you see them? Or can you knock on the door or give them a call and just say, “Hey, just to give you a heads up, this is going on, just so you know.” and leave it at that.

 

Post # 8
Member
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I don’t know that I would send out a letter at all. But perhaps instead of asking them not to call the cops, you could say that they should feel free to let YOU know if you are being too loud so that you can tone it down before they want to call the cops. A knock from your neghbor might be better than a knock from the cops. Or could you make some room at the reception to invite them?

You could also let them know in the letter that you have let your guests know not to block/park in other people’s driveways. I don’t know what your street looks like or how many guests you are having, but that might not be a bad idea.

 

Post # 9
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

“Dear Neighbours: I am so excited that I am getting married on January 1, 2022!  We are having our ceremony and reception in our backyard at 4579 Peach Terrace.  We anticipate that there will be more cars parked in the street than normal, and so we wanted to let you know about the event well in advance.  Please feel free to text me at 555-1212 if you have any complaints at all — we want everyone to be in a great mood on our special day!  Thanks, the Hoots.” 

Then make the number they text/call someone’s phone that is willing to take on that responsibility for the night.  Texting is much less confrontational than banging on someone’s door.

Post # 11
Member
361 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

We are also doing a backyard wedding.  We live on a circle, so there are only about 10 neighbors.  We are inviting them to the dance part of the reception so 1) They know its going on, 2)Hopefully, they won’t call the cops, 3) Helping neighbor relations.  We are the youngest couple on the block and have only lived in the neighborhood for about a year and a half, so its a nice icebreaker for us. 

Post # 12
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Mrs Hoot:  How many people are you inviting?  My parents and I considered having my reception at their house, and decided against it because parking would be a nightmare…as would the bathroom situation!  But we were considering asking people to park in a public lot downtown, and having a shuttle service to our house.  You might consider that if parking is already tight in your neighborhood.  DO YOU SPELL IT NEIGHBOURHOOD?? lol.

Post # 14
Member
3692 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

Some friends of ours who live in the same neighborhood have a Halloween party every year that is “the” event of the year in our social circle.  Nothing too big or crazy, but to cut down on the number of cars in the street, they work out a deal with the neighbors around them to pay for use of their driveways so guests can park.  

Post # 15
Member
9917 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2013

@Mrs Hoot:  That is a lot of extra cars.  I would try to work out a shuttle service somehow.  Good luck!

Post # 16
Member
9142 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL

I would sent a nice card giving them a heads up and apologizing ahead of time that way they will be prepared for it.  But I wouldn’t specifically ask them not to call the cops.  Even if you’re not friendly why don’t you just extend an invitation for them to attend the wedding?

And PPs are correct in advising you to check with your local ordinances to find out what the rules are regarding noise and music (how many feet?  how late at night? etc….)  We have to shut everything down by 10pm in order to comply with the local noise ordinance.  We plan to cut the DJ by 10pm and move the party inside or to a local pub.

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