Debate: Being comfortable in the body you are in Vs. Need to loose weight

posted 1 year ago in Wellness
Post # 16
611 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

mrsnitti17 :  my endocrinologist told me that health care professionals are now being told to be content if their patients maintain their weight, as permanent weight loss is so rarely seen and upheld. He explained that our bodies have so many mechanisms for gaining weight and basically none for losing, and that the diet industry sees people ending up bigger, not smaller, hence the “yay, you are doing great even though you are overweight” mentality. As a fellow overweight bee, I agree, it’s disheartning and a bit depressing! I think it’s true that the only people who achieve long term weight loss as those that take up a permanent lifestyle change. It definitely can be done. If you are being healthy bee, that is awesome in terms of what it’s doing for your physical well being. Frustrating though for sure. 

Post # 17
201 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

I think it also depends on how much you weigh and how it is distributed (ie: belly fat being worse than other areas for metabolic syndrome and health issues).  

Have you tried lifting weights? 

I would see another dietitian for a second opinion too.

Post # 18
676 posts
Busy bee


I am turning 30 in December. I am evidently obese by BMI standards but look nothing close to obese. But something that really hit me was this…

A bit of life advice from Hol:It’s a strange thing to realise and accept your mortality at 26 years young. It’s just…

Posted by Holly Butcher on Wednesday, January 3, 2018

I just can’t care anymore about how I look. Yes I try to take care of myself but that letter really hit home. 


Post # 19
660 posts
Busy bee

Get a 2nd opinion. That dietitian is an idiot. BUT….you do also have to have self love. You can lose all the weight, but that isn’t the answer to feeling good about yourself. Don’t get me wrong, it does help.

From previous replies – have you had your thyroid checked and other possible weight loss affectors tested?

Also – what is your exercise like? If you go for the typical 30-45 minutes of cardio and do the same thing, then that’s not helping you. If you only like cardio, you have to challenge yourself each time and switch it up.

I wish more women would try this but lift weights…..but go heavy!!!!! If you can do 8-10 reps easy, then it’s too easy! It’s too light. NO…you will NOT get bulky! You will tighten up jiggly areas and muscle burns more calories than cardio. On a day you lift, your body continues to burn those extra calories for a full day after. Cardio doesn’t.

I did cardio a long time ago and starved myself to get thin and it worked, got to a size 8 but then i started eating again and this was obviously so unhealthy. Then a few years ago I started lifting weights along with cardio and boy has my body changed! I look so much better now than i did when i only did cardio and i even weight more than back then. I still have weight to lose, but i focus on the body fat.

I’m a bit of a nutrion and fitness freak – message me directly and i’d be happy to help with the more technical stuff 🙂

Post # 20
4046 posts
Honey bee

First, 15 lbs! Way to go!

But I think your dietitian is full of crap and taking the easy way out. If you hit a plateau, keep going. It may take you longer to lose than your husband, don’t make it a race. See if there’s anything you can cut out of your diet. Be merciless. 

I don’t believe in all this genetic body size, you’re the size you ought to be  business. The fact is the US has been getting fatter as the years go on. Much fatter. Is it because in the last decade or two peoples metabolisms have left them unable to lose weight? Of course not. It’s the wrong food, the wrong portion size etc. In your case you’ve grown impatient. 

FWIW, my 23 and Me health report said very clearly that I have a tendency to weigh more than other people. I’m 118 at 5ft 4. So much for tendencies. Pointing out that it’s not healthy to be overweight is not fat shaming. We are so afraid of being politically correct and not hurting someone’s feelings that now healthcare professionals are going to spout this drivel?

I’m not buying it. OP, turn up the heat and feed it less fuel. Exercise and real dieting…not just healthy eating. When you’re really dieting you’re hungry at night when you go to bed. You wake up in the morning and you’re fine, ready to eat breakfast. A little hunger is ok. You’re used to eating much more.and it takes your body a while to catch up. 

Post # 22
1631 posts
Bumble bee

Your body generally has a natural set point…so I generally think if your other numbers are good (cholesterol, blood pressure, glucose levels, etc.), and you’re eating well and exercising, and you’re still overweight then it sort of it is what it is. 

Post # 23
2395 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Got don’t mention how overweight your are. Are we talking over 100lbs or less than 50? Because that 50lbs could just be a relatively healthy weight “for you”. I’m 5’2″ and I look and feel awesome at about 145lbs. That’s definitely “overweight”… but it puts me in a comfortable size 6 or 8. No way am I going to battle down to 115 lbs. Heck, I even feel & look pretty good at 160 lbs.

Post # 24
590 posts
Busy bee

I personally don’t agree we should be encouraging ‘real dieting’ if that involves going to bed hungry! That doesn’t sound sustainable and also sounds like it’ll only encourage a binge fest when fed up with real dieting (or maybe that would just be me ;-)).

We should be eating a balanced diet, which yes, does contain a little bit of sugar, fats etc because our body does need all this too (and even things it doesn’t need like chocolate won’t do much harm in little quantities). Eat when you feel hungry but stop when you feel satisfied and try not to overeat 🙂 

It sounds like you’re eating well and doing exercise. Could your BMI be due to muscle mass? Have you seen your percentage of fat mass compared to muscle mass?

Post # 25
111 posts
Blushing bee

Find another one, he/she sounds pants 

Post # 26
215 posts
Helper bee

You can be healthy and overweight. Dietitians are not obligated to help clients lose weight. No one is ever obligated to try to shrink. In fact, no one is obligated to be healthy. And body love is not necessary either. Body neutrality gets the job done. Find another dietician if you’re set on trying to lose weight, but understand that the evidence shows deliberate weight loss isn’t sustainable long term without a lifelong focus on maintaining it. To each his own, but a lifetime of the level of focus it takes to control one’s weight.. well, as someone who lost two decades to it already, it sounds miserable.

Post # 27
4046 posts
Honey bee

I don’t know why it’s so hard to understand that if you need to lose weight you must consume less calories than you expend.. Heaven forbid you go to bed on anything but a full stomach. And while it’s great to eat healthy, even healthy food has calories and you’re not going to lose weight if you don’t eat less. I saw a lot of geriatric 60+ patients in my job. You may be fat and “healthy” at a young age, but the body changes, and you change your body (pregnancy). Excess weight hurts mobility and joints. It’s not just about having good cholesterol and resting pulse today. 

Diets do work if you change your habits. Change your habits and you feel better, there’s nothing miserable about it. What was miserable to me was not fitting in clothes and feeling fat and looking in the mirror and having it confirmed. 

OP, if you’re happy with where you are on the scale, cool. You’re happy enough with your body. to post photos in your dress, which is great. Keep doing what you’re doing and you won’t gain weight and it won’t be miserable. If you want to go lower you have to eat less. It’s that simple. I’m not a fan of keto carb-free diets, or whatever the next fad is. I say eat a normal diet, just less. Your body needs carbs, the more complex the better. Drink lots of water.

I could go on about glycogen storage, fat storage and water but I’ll spare you. The first ~10 lbs are the easy ones, since they are to a large percentage water. Losing fat is harder because done right you need to do it slowly and keep it up for a long time, depending on your weight. When you change your eating for a year, you build new habits. Done correctly, diets do work. I’ve seen it many times, even in people who insisted they couldn’t possibly lose weight. 


Post # 28
590 posts
Busy bee

I’m not saying she should go to bed with a full stomach. I don’t think being ‘full/stuffed’ is healthy just like we shouldn’t allow ourselves to get really hungry…that’s when overeating happens. I don’t think going to bed hungry is a good idea. Maybe it works for you, but that would never work for me, i can see myself waking up in the middle night and eating or being so miserable because I’m hungry all the time. You can lose weight without going to bed hungry. 

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