- 7 years ago
- Wedding: March 2013
My fiance and I were recently engaged and I’m struggling with picking out my maid of honor.
The girl that I want to be my Maid/Matron of Honor is already engaged, and getting married 6 months before I am (her wedding is Nov 2012, and mine will be April 2013).
Would it be rude to ask her to be my Maid/Matron of Honor, since she is already planning her own wedding?
She and I have known each other for about a two years at this point, and she is one of my few female friends.
We are both having small weddings so neither of us wanted big wedding parties.
I’m actually not in hers because she is using her sister and her best friend of 18 years-which makes sense. She just happens to be the girl that I’m closest to (my fiance and parents do not like the ideal of “bridesmen” so it has to be a girl).
I think that she would be perfect because she and I could sort of plan our weddings/receptions together. Also, I’m not looking for her to pay for anything (including her dress) because I know that she is planning her own wedding, plus, her SO will already be in my fiance’s party. Basically I’m hoping that she can help me plan, and go shopping with me, just as I have with her (although I am not in her party).
I would in no way be offended if she said she couldnt, or didnt want to but I didnt know if it was rude (or weird, since we havent known each other that long) to ask in the first place.
Ideally, She would be my Maid/Matron of Honor and my 2 future sister in laws would be bridesmaids (or matrons of honor).
My next question is, I was a bridesmaid two months ago, for someone that I was good friends with, until she got engaged. She was a completely nightmare to deal with, including her Maid/Matron of Honor, and I spent the better part of 10 months in tears because of her.
Since her wedding this past summer things have been better- but I dont want to add her to my bridal party at all.
Is that ok? She and I have known each other for about 6 years know (we met through our Sos). Before she was engaged, we used to talk about how we would be each others MOHs (I wasnt hers, because her mom insisted on a family member).
Things got so bad between us, mainly because of her Maid/Matron of Honor, and now my SO doesnt care for her, and honestly, I would much rather have the other girl and my two sister in laws.
To make is worse, all of our SOs are best friends (me, the girl I dont want to add, and the girl I want to be my MOH). I dont know if it would be weird if I asked one girl to be my Maid/Matron of Honor and didnt ask the other to be in my bridal party- Especially since I was in her bridal party- and I’m not in the girls who I want to be my MOH’s party.
Sorry, I’ve been so stressed about this!
I thought it would be easier just to pick one of my Sis in laws but the one I’m closer too, is super nice, but gets stressed out so easily and I think I’d end up being more stressed out with her planning . I could ask the other, Sis in law but then I know that the one I’m closer too would be deeply offended.