Post # 1
Anyone who says RSVPs are a stressful part of wedding planning is SO right! The deadline for our May 12th wedding was April 8th and we have only received 34 out of 96 responses. While looking through today’s tally I noticed that one of our male friends has accepted the reception yet declined the ceremony. (His wife confirmed that this is correct and she WILL be attending the ceremony…) Am I missing something here?
We are getting married “out of town”, she does not drive, and he is just going to hang out in the parking lot? I’m so confused. Would it be rude to ask why? I was the Maid/Matron of Honor in their wedding and feel equally close to both of them, as does my Fiance. (In truth, it kind of hurts my feelings that he isn’t willing to be there with us.)
Just wondering if anyone else has had a similar situation?!?
Post # 3
Very strange. All I can think is that he has some sort of completely unavoidable commitment during the time of your ceremony, and is planning to travel separately from his wife in order to be there for your reception. If you guys are that close (you were Maid/Matron of Honor in their wedding), I think that you should be able to ask what’s up, and/or they should volunteer to explain the situation!
Post # 4
is the reception immediately after the ceremony or is there a time gap?
Post # 6
It is immediately following, in fact, it is in the schoolhouse next door. I am going to try and pin them down tomorrow. They seemed too busy to chat tonight. Argggg…
Post # 7
Hmm that is weird. Unless he has an unavoidable committment it really isn’t polite to skip the ceremony and just show up for the party…I wouldn’t feel comfortable doing that.
I might have your Fiance just ask casually if he is close to them, I don’t think it would hurt to get the details.
Post # 8
We had a few people do this but we had a Friday wedding and a gap so we kind of expected it. I would definitely see of you can find out. Just like “oh it’s too bad x can’t make the ceremony.” and see what she volunteers.
Post # 9
I wouldn’t make a big deal out of it – I’m sure there is a perfectly legitimate reason for it but I think it could become awfully uncomfortable if you confront the couple on the issue to find out why.
To be honest, I’m surprised your friend even specified that he won’t be attending the ceremony. I occasionally don’t attend ceremonies but go to the reception later (usually when there’s a gap between) but I never mark that on the rsvp card – I figure they don’t really need an exact number for the ceremony as there’s generally not a per person cost.
Post # 10
Maybe he just wants to party and not be botohered with the wedding.lol. Idk…..it will be interesting to hear their explanatio
Post # 11
My guess is that he has a committment during the time of the ceremony. While its not the politest thing to decline a ceremony and show up for the party, it is an invitaiton, not a summons, and people are free to choose what portions they attend.
Post # 12
Well the explaination wasn’t what I expected but at least I have an answer. He doesn’t “do” weddings and will in fact be right outside the entire time. That’s fine. I’ll give him the title of grill monitor… he can make sure nothing catches on fire!
Post # 13
@Fixin2BMrs.Awesome: Weird but whatever…. Especially of you have a task that you didn’t want to assign to somebody because they’d have to miss the ceremony that works out perfectly I guess.
Post # 14
maybe its a being inside a church thing???
Post # 15
Haha that is so odd!
If he doesn’t ‘do’ weddings, how did he get married to his wife?
Post # 16
@Fixin2BMrs.Awesome: We had FOUR responses (13 people all together) decline the ceremony but accept the reception. We got married in town…. seems like these people just wanted a free meal and free booze and didn’t care much about us actually getting married.
I didn’t really do anything about it because there’s not much you can do, but I definitely thought it was odd that SO many people responded in that way.