Post # 1

Member
42 posts
Newbee
Ok..I will try to be very nice about this, but my feelings are PRETTY sour!
Basically, the family over the road from my family have known me since I was little. When I was much younger, they always seemed very nice, they always sent me a birthday card at my birthday and they’ve remained in contact now I’ve moved, but there’s a problem.
The Mum of the family I find quite intefering, earlier I shared some links on Facebook for my wedding music, she commented that I should leave some surprises for my wedding day. A few years back I had a disaster when a fox knocked our BBQ in the night and it’d burnt a whole in the decking (FI and I had used it the night before) and rather than giving us guidance she just laughed about it and told half the street what we’d done. She’s involved with everything in our small village and goes to church then tries to feed you her own beliefs and shows no respect for mine. She always jokes about me doing so much housework yet her house has been investigated after reports of poor living conditions.
The thing is, her daughter is getting married 3 weeks after me and they want me not to share all the details of my wedding so there are suprises when they come to mine, even though they have known me a long time, they won’t be invited. My family’s immediate neighbours will be and only a couple near me and my Fiance now will be. In addition to this, I know I’m to be invited to thier daughter’s wedding and I don’t want to be there as she’s marrying in a Christian church and already has 2 children which totally defies Christian beliefs and marriage and I cannot be present at a religious ceremony which I feel goes against Christian beliefs.
How would you handle this one? I don’t want to sound bitter but I nor my family have much respect for thier ways.
Many thanks
MrsStobe813 x
Post # 3

Member
3943 posts
Honey bee
@MrsStobe813:I know I’m to be invited to thier daughter’s wedding and I don’t want to be there as she’s marrying in a Christian church and already has 2 children which totally defies Christian beliefs and marriage and I cannot be present at a religious ceremony which I feel goes against Christian beliefs.
Wow.
Post # 4

Member
10567 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
Do you really think it’s fair for you to state what all Christians believe? My church does not have an issue with parents getting married. To state that what she’s doing
totally defies Christian beliefs and marriage
is simply incorrect. If it goes against your beliefs that’s one thing, but please don’t paint all Christians with your very narrow brush.
Post # 5

Member
2385 posts
Buzzing bee
I would just RSVP “no” on their invitation. Not send them an invitation, and be done with it. Their feelings will likely be hurt, but it’s impossible to make it to your wedding day without hurting anyone’s feelings, and move on.
Post # 6

Member
2204 posts
Buzzing bee
If you want to decline an invitation, you check the box marked “Not attending”.
While I understand your annoyances with this lady, you’ve also made some serious judgements about her and her family. You complain about her making judgements about your cleaning habits and an accident (which aren’t really serious things, by the way) but you totally slam and judge her daughter.
Now, that’s not very Christian of you, is it?
Post # 7

Member
1110 posts
Bumble bee
I’m Catholic and marrying a man who has a daughter, our priest never even made an issue of it. I think you’re passing judgements that only God can pass so don’t go worrying about that stuff.
As far as telling the neighbors that a fox knocked over your bbq… so what? It was probably just a word of warning to be careful leaving hot coals out. I’m marrying a townie and everything everyone does is on display, if that happened to us, everyone would know about it. It’s just gossip, and it’s pretty common to talk about critters that have been seen in the neighborhood and damaging homes etc. I don’t know what you expected her to do to help you guys.
I think this lady just annoys you, and you have the right not to like her. So RSVP no to the wedding and send a card since they have been courteous to you and have sent you birthday cards all your life. It’s just a neighborhood rivalry, don’t take it to heart.
Post # 8

Member
161 posts
Blushing bee
You know what they say about religion and politics:) I’d decline and leave it at that… personally, I wouldn’t WANT someone to attend my wedding if they had issues with me or my marriage.
Post # 9

Member
1645 posts
Bumble bee
Well that’s the pot calling the kettle black.
Just reply no and don’t send them an invite. It doesn’t matter why you don’t want to go.
Post # 10

Member
225 posts
Helper bee
I know I’m to be invited to thier daughter’s wedding and I don’t want to be there as she’s marrying in a Christian church and already has 2 children which totally defies Christian beliefs and marriage and I cannot be present at a religious ceremony which I feel goes against Christian beliefs.
how very unchristian of you to say
“Judge not, that ye be not judged”??
Post # 11

Member
350 posts
Helper bee
Do them a favor and just decline 😉
Post # 12

Member
963 posts
Busy bee
Yes…I LOL’ed at this post. I think you just mark “not attending” and send a card.
Post # 14

Member
1365 posts
Bumble bee
Post # 15

Member
5891 posts
Bee Keeper
i doubt she’d want someone there who is not only unsupportive, but outright disapproving.
are you asking if we think it’s ok for you to decline?
Post # 16

Member
383 posts
Helper bee
So if a Christian woman has children out of wedlock, is she forever banned from all churches?
Why shouldn’t the church forgive her and welcome her back?
Do the family a favor and just decline the invitation. And maybe de-friend them on facebook if you don’t want their input.