Post # 1
So as many of you may already know from my previous posts, I have been with my SO for over 5 and a half years. However it feels like a lifetime since we have been through so many major milestones already.
To give you an idea, I am graduating college this Sunday with my Bachelor’s degree in Early Childhood Education. Today was my last day student teaching and all of my mentor teachers cannot believe I am not engaged yet. They are floored to hear it will be 6 years in October. My SO recently graduated in December and is currently employed as a temp in a nice testing company.
Ever since we began dating back in high school, we knew we wanted to marry each other. There has never been a doubt in either of our minds since. Now its almost 6 years down the line, and my SO JUST started to save up for an Engagement Ring. He only has about $450 saved up. Although, what further delays this is the fact that his student loans kick in the 1st week of June.
During high school, I always thought we would get married during my senior year of college. Well..as of this weekend it has come and gone. It is just really depressing to me that I had this timeline in my head for years and now my timeline I had planned is being pushed back.
I have many reasons for wanting to getting married young, including wanting to have all my children in my 20’s. However, most importantly it is because I love my SO and I want to take our relationship to that next step that we’ve been waiting to take now for years.
And for those who want to know, this is the ring my SO is saving up for:
Post # 3
Have you and your SO talked about the timeline? I think you need to have a conversation with him, you obviously feel strongly about getting engaged/married soon and it sounds like he’s doing his best to make it happen by saving up for a ring, but if you’re not happy with how slowly it’s going, you need to tell him that. That ring looks like it would cost more than $450 and it could be a while before he’s able to purchase it – are you willing to wait patiently?
Post # 4
He will not give me a timeline because he says he wants to “surprise” me. He wants me to have no clue when it is coming. Regarding the ring, I have shown him cheaper options. However, he insists on getting me my dream ring. (It’s a pride thing.) He said regardless of how much it costs it wouldn’t speed up the process of getting engaged any sooner. ):
Post # 5
@wmk6: It sounds like he’s pretty determined then, which is good because you know it’s coming, but bad because you know he’s okay with taking his time. I’d say if you know for sure the waiting is going to put strain on your relationship you need to sit him down and have a serious talk about your expectations.
Post # 6
I had sorta the same thing with my Fiance.. He kept telling me it was going to happen soon and for me to quit worrying… He wanted me to be surprised too so he wanted me to stop askig and expecting it… I think youbshould just calm down and I bet it will happen before you know it! :)know it it’s so hard to wait though!
Post # 7
@wmk6: I think it’s great that he wants it to be a surprise, as most guys do, and this is probably the hardest thing for us women. However, I also think it’s fair for you to ask for a general timeline, like say by the end of the year or something. I would tell him that you understand his need for this to be a surprise, but because of your goals and where you are at this point in your life, you’d like to know if it’s within a year or two or what. It’s not exactly after 6 years to keep you waiting indefinitely.
By the way, congrats on your graduation!!