Post # 1
I don’t know if this is the right place to post this I suppose I just need to say this to anyone who will listen. I have been married for four years I have two beautiful boys. I moved across the world to be with my husband. He is very good to me helps with kids house etc but I am so depressed here I feel so lonely I have no friends no family no one, just my hubby and kids. Sometimes I don’t leave the house for weeks because I have no where to go. There are no parks to the kids to around me. The nearest park is a 15 min drive I don’t even drive here because it’s crazy no road rules. I’m so jealous of my friends and family back home who ‘have a life’. I cry so much I don’t have the energy for life anymore. I just sit in my kitchen close the door and smoke and drink coffee it’s sad because that’s the only thing that makes me happy. My kids are very young so I can’t work I just don’t know what to do with myself. Loneliness is killing me. I feel like I’m trapped and I can’t seem to get passed this. I can’t find away to let go and enjoy my life because there is no enjoyment. I’m so dependent on my husband he does most of the shopping for me I just sit at home and cook clean and look after my kids. Sunday is family day we go out together but I don’t even enjoy that. I miss being me I miss having a life my life. My friends who understand me someone to talk to.
Post # 2
I don’t know what to say. It would be lonely and frustrating in that situation.
Post # 3
Sounds like a terrible situation for you. If you’re that miserable, it will ultimately start affecting your marriage and your children. Maybe you should talk seriously with your husband about relocating.
Even if you don’t work, you’ve got to be able to get out of the house. That’s not even safe or healthy for young kids. I’d say it’s time to move!
Post # 4
- Wedding: August 2013 - backyard in the woods
Spending that much time without adult ocmpanionship (outside your husband, which sounds minimal anyways) must be terrible. Have you talked about how you feel with your husband? You two should discuss how to make a change, to help you find a way to get out and meet people, whether there or by relocating. Your living environment is not healthy for you or your children. Maybe there are other local moms who feel the same as you and could use the company?
Post # 5
Keeping you in my thoughts! I am so sorry you feel this way. Depression is so hard. You need to tell your husband because you can’t continue to feel this way alone. Together you guys can make a solution happen. You are a team! <3 sending my love your way!
Post # 6
What do you mean no road rule?
Can you not go to any mother and children groups??
Post # 7
Sign up for a mommy and me class or if little ones old enough do a local sport. I know how you feel i only have one child and am a stay at home mommy . My fiancee thinks im a nut when i insist on going to the grocery store even if its for one item but to me that trip is 20 mins of being out amoung peple lol. I recently put my daughter in soccer so she and i can get some much needed social interaction. If opportunities like that are available in your area give it a try. Not all of them are expensive either if money is and issue which i dont think it sounds like thats the case with you. Good luck I hope you feel better
Post # 8
You need to at least get out to go on a walk. Sunshine, fresh air, a little exercise — all are great for helping relieve depression, and they are good for the kids too. I know you know that you’re not helping yourself by staying home and smoking all day, but think about your kids, too. They need to get out and breathe fresh air and see something other than the inside of the house. It’s good for them mentally and physically. If you live in an urban setting, just walk a few blocks and look at the buildings and people. If you’re in a suburban or rural setting, enjoy the trees or flower or bees. If you can’t do it for yourself, do it for the kids. You will all benefit.
And while you’re walking, think about other ways to change your life. Learn to drive despite the crazy road rules — your sanity is worth the risk! Meet the neighbors. There have to be other options — there are ALWAYS other options — you’re just in too much of a rut to think of them. But a little exercise and fresh air will get oxygen moving through your brain, and I think you will find it easier to find the options then. The vast majority of my best ideas have come to me while hiking — that is also when I tend to arrive at answers to my biggest decisions. It’s amazing how a little movement and sunshine can affect us.
Post # 9
Is there a reason you had to move so far?
Post # 10
What kinds of things did you do before when you were still “you”? Did you like painting, exercise, or gardening? Try to find out if there are any clubs/groups/classes you could join, maybe even look at Meetup.com for a random girls’ night in your area.
I have moved too and sometimes I don’t feel like I have friends other than my Fiance. So just going out with a group of people or a couple individuals, even with no intention of making lasting friendships, is refreshing and helpful.
Post # 11
I agree with MelissainNC:
it is so imoortant for our mental and emotional wellbeing to get some sunshine and fresh air. I am sure it sounds silly, but getmthe strollers out and get outside.
I hope you can find a mommy and me group or even a reading club for just you to attend in the evening. You should talk to your husband and ask him for help getting you out among grown ups. It has to be so hard, but since you have a strong marriage I am sure you can find some solutions together.
Post # 12
I honestly think the first thing you need to do is tell your husband that you are Not Well emotionally and that you need to go see your doctor. You need a professional to make some suggestions, to help your husband take this seriously, and to motivate you to come up with a plan to change your life. You might need meds. You might be vitamin deficient and need B12 or D or whatever. You might need a “prescription” for fresh air and exercise and activities. But you can’t just continue the way you are. Something needs to change and the ONE thing you can do is go talk to the doctor and lay it all on the line. This is hard stuff but it CAN get better. You are in my thoughts.