(Closed) depressed…..my husband died.

posted 8 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 62
Member
11267 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2012

i am so sorry to hear this.  my thoughts and prayers are with you and your baby.  

Post # 63
Member
2103 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I’m so sorry. I know these words don’t really mean much, but your post touched my heart this morning. I will pray for you, your families, and the baby. Despite losing someone really close to me, I can’t even begin to think of the pain of losing my husband and being pregnant at the same time. I do think you should spend some time with your family. Maybe you can get some sort of approved leave from your job?

Again, my hearts goes out to you. I’m sending you good thoughts and healing energy.

Post # 64
Member
14 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2013

I am so terribly sorry for your loss and can’t even imagine to begin what you must be going through. You have every right to feel as you do and I’m only sorry that your in-laws are not being more supportive of you during this time.  Grief can cause people to act out in strange ways. Right now it’s important to focus on surrounding yourself with those who love and care and support you, so it would absolutely make sense for you to move closer to family to get the support you need. And your feelings are completely understandable about the baby. I hope that you can enlist the help of a trusted counselor to help you work through your grief and the many issues you are facing. Please also know that you are not alone and there are other women who have been in the exact same situation as you have and that while it may seem hopeless right now, you will survive this.

I recently read an article in an advice column that described this very same situation. Here is a link: http://www.slate.com/articles/life/dear_prudence/2011/05/pregnant_widow.html. This article also mentions a group called Young Widow (http://www.youngwidow.org/) that offers online support and information that you may wish to look into. 

Sending warm thoughts and prayers your way.

 

Post # 65
Member
1329 posts
Bumble bee

I cannot begin to imagine how you feel.  I wish there was something I could say that would take your pain away. While all of this seems overwhelming right now, the utter pain and agony will begin to fade with time. It is surrounding yourself with people who love and care for you and you should absolutely not be left alone for whatever reason..just because it is a fragile time and if you need someone to chat with, someone should always be close by.

Do you have someone who can stay with you for the next few months? Friend, mom, anyone? You need someone to stay with you, to help you when the baby arrives, and make sure you are eating and rseting.

Please talk to your doctor for referrals to local counselling groups and just focus on putting on foot in front of the other for now.

 

Post # 66
Member
606 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I am so sorry for your loss. Please take all the time you need to grieve, and lean on family and friends for support. May your baby bring you joy when the time comes, and always be a positive reminder of the love you and your husband shared. I hope you can find peace during this incredibly sad time. ((**hugs**))

Post # 67
Member
598 posts
Busy bee

This is absolutely heart breaking, I am so sorry!

My aunt was 7 months pregnant with her son when her husband died in a car accident. She had to raise her son alone. She was struggling to stay optimistic and so she created a widowers support group. In it she met her current husband, and after 7 years of sorting out their past lives, they finally got married and have been since then.

I am truly sorry for you, and wish you the best. I hope you find lots of love and support from family and friends. Having a support group and a church helped my aunt. HUGS

Post # 68
Member
3000 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Oh my goodness, I am so sorry for your loss. I can’t begin to imagine what you are going through but you will be in my prayers. 

Post # 69
Member
928 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I am so, so sorry for your loss. Grieving for a husband while pregnant has got to be about one of the worst things a woman can go through.

I really strongly suggest that you consider counseling throughout your pregnancy and while you’re adjusting to life as a new mother. And please accept any help that your family and friends may offer. Let them help you through this.

Also, don’t let anyone tell you how you should feel! Feel however you feel, but make sure to talk to someone about it.

I feel like my post is so stupid and trite and cannot possibly be helpful, but at the very least you know someone out there is thinking about you and praying for you. The bee will always be happy to support you whenever you need it. Much love to you and your little baby!

Post # 70
Member
181 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2009

Ughh!! I cant even imagine ur pain! I am SOOOO SOOO SORRY for the loss of ur husband. My condolences to u and ur family. (((HUGS))).

Post # 71
Member
7605 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

How heartbreaking.  I’m so very sorry.  I think moving closer to your family is a wonderful idea right now; let them hold you up.  I’m really so very sorry.  Wishing you and your little one all the best.

Post # 72
Member
189 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I am so sorry for your loss and that you are going through this. Sending positive thoughts and hugs your way.

Post # 73
Member
340 posts
Helper bee

I am so sorry to hear that; I can’t imagine how you feel. That has to be so hard! You need to move closer to your family so they can help with the baby and you can heal. I am sure you will love the baby once you have it and it is amazing that you have a memory of your husband. I know you don’t feel like that now, but down the road you will. Also, your Mother-In-Law is terrible for saying that. How can she pass blame and tell you to cheer up one min and then say the baby is a blessing the other!? I am so so sorry you are going through this.

Post # 74
Member
1652 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

@starry: Hello again, I have been thinking about you and feeling so much sadness for you. I think going to live near or with your family is a really good idea. If your in-laws are not supportive place some distance to them while still allowing them to see their grandchild once it comes. Just take care of yourself and give it time. I also think like others have said that couselling would provide you some emotional support. Have you got some good friends you can lean on. I can’t imagine how you feeling being pregnant while dealing with this. Love and good thoughts for your healing process xox

Post # 75
Member
1105 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

So so very sorry for your loss!!  Sending you lots of thoughts and prayers your way!

Post # 76
Member
2017 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Just like everyone else, I so sorry for the loss of your husband, especially at this time in your life.

I also second PP suggestions for counseling asap. Because having a baby releases such a flood of emotions and hormones, it’s really hard to deal with even without the grief factor.

Take good care of your yourself and your baby. And when you’re ready a widow/widowers support group is a great idea. Those people understand what you’re going through in a way no one else can.

A friend of mine was widowed with two young children. He started with a group and a year or two later met his second wife there.

Much luck and good wishes for your future.

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