(Closed) Depressing Question

posted 8 years ago in Full Figured
Post # 3
Member
860 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

I’m sorry you are feeling down… be good to yourself!  You don’t have to be a certain size to be beautiful.  Like you said, your Fiance loves you.  What is importrant is how you feel in the moment and that you have a good time!

That being said, have you tried the South Beach diet?  I mean, really followed though with it and followed it exactly?  My Fiance did this, and lost over 50 pounds since October… I’m sure you could lose a few b/w now and September.

Post # 4
Member
502 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Ok…I’m not really plus size but had a similar feeling regarding the budget of my wedding. And at the end I came to realize that it had a lot to do with all the wedding porn I was watching. Most blogs/inspiration boards/etc are of 25k and up weddings and so I became very sad that my wedding wasn’t going to have chivari chairs and uplighting when it seemed so normal in everyone else’s. I’m clearly still on a wedding blog, so its not like I stopped wedding porn watching, but I started to look more on sites like offbeatbride and 2000dollarwedding. This basically meant that when I came across ideas I liked, I could afford them for once! lol. It also gave me a broader perspective on what weddings “should look like”. So…I guess what I’m trying to say is that instead of focusing our energy into what we wish we/our wedding would look like, we should focus more energy on how to make the best of what we got. I.e. look up poses that are most flattering for plus sized brides.

Post # 5
Member
4466 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

Weight Watchers.  Seriously.  It’s the best way to learn to actually live a healthy lifestyle and change your eating and exercise habits.

You can go to meetings, or just do it online. 

Post # 6
Member
195 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

Aww try not to feel down about it!

I’m a 12, (from a 10, before that an 8, before that a 14, etc…) get my drift?

Yeah it sucks. We all have high hopes of droping so many lbs before the big day. I secretly hate all the girls that managed to do it. I’m just busy, and I didn’t. I planned to loose 1-2 lbs a week. A year ago. Umm yeah. Didn’t happen. Ya know, what though, oh well.

I know how frustrating it is to do the work and not see any changes. That’s when I just stop. THAT is what bums me out usually. I LOVE my dress. I LOVE my fiance. The most important thing to me is that we get married that day. I would get married in a potato sack w/ bedhead. When I get caught up in worrying about what I’m going to look at, I remind myself that how I look in my dress is NOT the reason for all of this. and then I don’t care and I let myself be happy, even if it is in a dress that is bigger than I had hoped 🙂

Post # 7
Member
2821 posts
Sugar bee

I’m sure you don’t look disgusting and I think it’s great you found someone who loves and cherishes you whether you’re a 10 or 20. 

Do you want to try to change eating and exercize habits before the wedding or is it more just accepting who you are right now?

Post # 8
Member
195 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2010

hah that being said… South Beach works for me for a loss jumpstart… I’m a belly fat girl w/ a sugar problem! 🙂

and drinking tons of water really does make a difference…

Post # 9
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’m sorry you feel this way. I was overweight growing up and did not lose it until college and know how you feel. I’ve now gained about 15lbs back and it’s so hard to make the commitment to lose weight. For the past few months I have been trying to motivate myself but honestly have not been putting in the effort. Now with a little under 2 months until the dress arrives I finally started eating right and excercising. It’s a real commitment but it can be done! To help me get through with it try to think positive! Don’t use words like disgusting, that is only going to make you feel more discouraged. Start doing things for yourself like going on an after dinner walk or skipping out on that cookie at work. It’s tough I know! I was very tempted to eat the goodies at my staff meeting this morning but I did it! Don’t deprive yourself either, if you know you are going somewhere with unhealthy goodies make sure you have some healthy snacks packed to kills the temptations. Good luck!!!

 

Post # 10
Member
429 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

My Fiance had a long distance relationship in the beginning. Nearly a month and a half went by at one point, and he was taking energy pills throughout this time. The next time I saw him, he looked soooo different. He lost about 55 pounds in a matter of 2-3 months. Crazy. I didn’t know about these pills until a year later when he fessed up, and I made him bring up the website so I could read about them. I know this stuff isn’t exactly the safest way to lose weight, but it curbed his appetite to the point that he had lost so much weight.

He’s started to gain it back, and I’m nervous that he’s going to resort to these pills again before the wedding. He’s already told me that we won’t have any engagement photos taken until he loses at least 20 pounds. (Considering the amount of mayo he slaps on everything…I dont think I’ll ever have engagement photos.)

I know the other Bees will shun me to saying so….but doing something to curb your appetite would be an option.

Post # 13
Member
4466 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

@holtesl: Unfortunately, the only way to safely/heathily lose weight is to eat less and exercise more.  If your Fiance is a chef and cooks with those heavy sauces and such, you need to either eat (much) less of it, or cook for yourself/skip it altogether.

Also, do you work out at all?  Walking, joining a gym, doing workout videos, etc. would all be a step in the right direction.  But you’re probably not going to lose any serious weight unless you cut down/out the heavy food.

Post # 14
Member
2821 posts
Sugar bee

Ahhh….that does make it difficult, but it should be somewhat healthy meals then, no? 

Try to eat slllllllllllllllllooooooooooooowwwwwwwwwly, your stomach takes awhile to get the full signals so eating slow helps a lot.  Take a walk after dinner with your hubs, maybe before dinner too.  A great workout for people just starting to lose weight I think is a bike, little impact but a great workout you can really adjust to how hard you want to work. 

What are your main junk food?  Do you drink soda?  There’s usually lots of little things you can cut out.  If you have a big craving I’ve found fasting for a day (yes it’s difficult) really works.  Every once in awhile I get reallllllllly addicted to coffee and fasting  does the trick to help me normalize again. 

Post # 15
Member
6597 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2010

Honestly you don’t sound like you are ready to make the change. If you REALLY want to do this talk to your Fiance and get him to help you!

The new weight watchers online makes it easy to create recipes which allows you to enter each ingredient and adds up all the points for you!

You have to be ready to buckle down and work at it though there isn’t an easy fix.

In 4 months you can lose between 16 and 30 pounds safely. If you want to do it you can!

Post # 16
Member
115 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

I’m sorry you’re feeling so yucky. Just try to do your best but remember the important things. You are getting MARRIED!!! And to a man that loves you just the way you are!! I know it probably doesn’t help your depressed state but try to look at the positives.

As for the weight loss, have you tried weight training? Muscle burns more than fat so that could really help. I love the Jillian Michaels DVDS-she does a great job.

Also, if you cut out carbs after 5pm and stick to a diet mainly consisting of lean proteins, fruits, veggies, etc that will help. Easier said than done though!

Good luck! Keep your chin up

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