Depression, pain, and medications, husband disapproval

posted 3 weeks ago in Wellness
Post # 46
Member
6674 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 1997

Realistically, he is toxic to you and you have admitted that you wouldn’t want children subjected to his judgement, so it is only a matter of time before you leave. Right? You know he is awful for you and that there’s no future with him, so I’d suggest you leave sooner rather than later. 

Post # 47
Member
1384 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2019 - USA

selissal :  Telling someone that their own experiences and feelings are not valid, is literally the definition of gaslighting. Which is a form of manipulation and abuse in relationships. He sounds like he has some sort of god complex which is really disturbing to see in a medical “professional”. Part of being a good physician involves admitting what you don’t know.

Please start squirreling away some money to move out (or ask your family or friends) and consult a divorce attorney ASAP. Your partner should be your greatest source of comfort, NOT your adversary. 

Post # 48
Member
11140 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

selissal :  

Bee, the DV Hotline has a chat feature available 24/7.  You can use it any time to talk about your relationship.  Emotional abuse is *real* abuse and you’re experiencing severe emotional abuse.  It costs nothing to talk to a counselor.  Your husband never has to know.

Have you talked to your therapist about being evaluated for PTSD?  Do you disclose everything about your husband’s behavior to your therapist?

Here is the link to the counselors.

 

Home – The Hotline®

Post # 49
Member
45 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2014

Hugs!

 

I’ve nothing more to add since you have received such good advice. You are so young, far too young to be living like this, keeping secrets from the person you should be able to trust the most. 

As for your husband… well, how fortunate for him that he has never felt physical or emotional trauma. Too bad he has no empathy for those who have. 

The sooner you leave, the sooner you will be on your way to living your fullest life. I also imagine a huge weight will be lifted when no longer under his thumb and judgement. 

Learn your lesson going forward and chose a great supportive partner who will always have your back next time. Everything is easier when you’re in it together rather than needing to prove your worth. 

Good luck!

Post # 50
Member
254 posts
Helper bee

Leave him now before an oops pregnancy ties you and your child to this horrible person for the rest of your life. You know this is a bad relationship and he’s a bad person. Take care of yourself now and save yourself years of anxiety and heartache.

Post # 51
Member
2284 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2017

Your husband sounds like a total asshole. That is really sad that he is treating patients in the ED. Don’t take what he says to heart. He just sounds like a big bully. 

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