(Closed) Destination Wedding…Everyone backing out

posted 4 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 16
Member
2359 posts
Buzzing bee

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bride2bee91784:  What is the age break down and those who are older…how old are they and do they dance? ‘Cause age doesnt matter if they want to dance.

Destination Wedding are hard for people. Traveling is expensive.

Post # 17
Member
620 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

I’ve always gone To DWs for clients, family, and friends–surprisingly lots of my clients invite me to their weddings.  I’ve been to one in Indonesia at a private island.  Damn beautiful wedding. 

 

Post # 18
Member
620 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2019

God stupid thing cut me off.  What I meant to say is, the disappointment is understandable. Hope you feel better soon.

Post # 20
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: Santo Domingo, Dominican Republic

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bride2bee91784:  I completely understand how you feel. One of my guest claims that he’s fighting with HR so that they can approve his vacation. Funny thing is that I found out through a family member that hes not going. I don’t understand why people do this. We decided to have a destination wedding so that my family could attend. So many people said that they were going and bailed out last minute. My wedding is in June all of the groomsmen bailed out. My husband was so sad. Your wedding is going to be great, enjoy it, don’t let any of this make you second guess your day. 

Post # 21
Member
4431 posts
Honey bee

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bride2bee91784:  I went to a small destination wedding recently, and we had a good time. They didn’t have a DJ, but had a few playlists ready to go. They also had a big basket full of things for the kids to do, which, frankly, the adults enjoyed just as much. I think the thing missing was an after party, as a PP mentioned. 

Post # 22
Member
667 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

My wedding was destination for both of our families.  I received my rsvp’s from most people in a timely manner.  THen…we had 4 people bail because people could not get time off from work…2 more bail because of health issues…all within the last month.  Even when people intend to go to a wedding, plans may have to change.  People who were all about coming ended up getting pregnant and had twins the day of my wedding…

Post # 23
Member
4431 posts
Honey bee

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bride2bee91784:  oh, and get a Mariachi band!

Post # 24
Member
319 posts
Helper bee

I had 23 people at my dw wedding and 3 were kids. To liven up the week we threw a welcome happy hour and gave guests awesome welcome bags. Then we hosted a private snorkel trip/ catamaran sailing afternoon w a nice meal and drinks. Then our wedding came and we offered a happy hour and then a nice 3 course meal. Then we all met up for an optional after party at a late night bar. Some people came others did not. It was fun to extend the party and there was music and dancing there.

 

we didn’t invite that many people– only 35 total and 23 came. We also picked Maui because its easy to get to from California where all of our guests lived. It also did t require passports or give anyone anxiety about traveling out of country. Traveling abroad sometimes requires vaccinations, passports, can be expensive sometimes. Also some people are scared of going to Mexico because of gangs and drug cartels. So for our situation, Maui was very accepted by our guests. Also our guests could rent condos and did not require staying at a resort.

Post # 25
Member
6168 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 2017

Don’t stress out so much!!!!!! This happens  to most destination weddings. People start dropping out like flies. Your nearest and dearest will be there so be happy for that ☺ and there will be other people vacationing at your destination, if you feel like more of a party then go to a dance club in town and you and your guests can let loose in a fun crowd. Congratulations!

Post # 26
Member
350 posts
Helper bee

23 is a lot of people to attend a Destination Wedding……

Post # 27
Member
302 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

First of all, congratulations on your destination wedding! It will be beautiful, I am sure. 

Now, when I put myself in the shoes of a guest attending a Destination Wedding I imagine myself being excited to take a vacation of my own and see a close friend of mine get married. I imagine that any fun I want to have probably won’t be spent with the bride or groom for the purpose of letting them enjoy their alone time. I imagine the reception would be small and intimate, with some food and champagne, and then I would go about enjoying the rest of my vacation. 

It sounds to me like you don’t think your guests will have fun unless you provide the fun. Would I be correct in saying that? I am getting married at an all inclusive resort, and have let my guests know that this is a time for them to take a beautiful vacation and spend a night with us on the beach when we get married. At the place I am getting married, there will be a lot of fun stuff for my guests to do and plenty of activities to keep them busy the whole time at no extra cost.

If your destination wedding sounds similar to mine in the way that there will be plenty for guests to do, I wouldn’t worry about having a big party of a reception to please your guests (unless a big party of a reception is what you want!). Just let your guests know what to expect! Never forget, this is about you and your FH. Your guests should enjoy their time on vacation and be happy seeing you two get married. 

Post # 28
Member
319 posts
Helper bee

I think at least one wedding event outside the day of is good idea. If they are traveling all this way and spending money you should provide an activity they would likely do anyway. Like a snorkel trip or if in Mexico a day trip to some Mayan ruins. This saves them money. Plus other guests can meet and mingle and it makes the wedding day more special when everyone knows each other.

Post # 29
Member
733 posts
Busy bee

People are probably delaying sending in an RSVP because they are trying to make the money work. Just count them out, they will probably not be able to afford it.

As far as a very small wedding, we had one. I opted not to have a DJ, so we had a ceremony, a sit down dinner, and that was that. It was fine. We had a string quartet play during the ceremony and meal, and by the time it was over, I was glad we didn’t have some lengthy party because I was done. I’m not much of the center of attention type.

Look at it this way, you get to spend more quality time with your guests.

Post # 30
Member
4214 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2016 - Manhattan, NY

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bride2bee91784:  Hubby and I had a destination wedding, though not out of the country, and had a brunch reception after our morning wedding. There were 20 of us around a long table in the private room of a restaurant and it was a fun time. We got to enjoy all of our family and friend’s company. We didn’t have any decor or music other than what was playing in the restaurant. We actually loved the family dinner feel and it was far from boring. It sounds like your guests will have a lot of ways to entertain themselves on the resort, and you could always party at one of the bars later if the dinner is too calm for your tastes. Best of luck! 

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