beeeyonce144444 : First of all, congrats on your engagement bee! It’s an exciting time, and I’m glad to hear you’re enjoying the planning process so far 🙂
I actually attended a Destination Wedding in Bali a few years back (I live in the US) and it was absolutely BEAUTIFUL. The couple had rented out an entire resort (boutique villa right by the ocean) and the guests were welcomed with never-ending courses of meals, drinks, local artists’ performance, and even a firework show!! Like you, the couple had offered to pay for guests accomodation (3 nights to be exact, and came with daily breakfast). It was no brainer for me to attend this wedding, because:
1) At the time I was working for a company that gave out 5 weeks of paid vacation/year.
2) I LOVE to travel and typically plan at least 1 international destionation every year. I hadn’t been to Bali yet at the time of invitation, and with advanced notice I had plenty of time to plan and make their Destination Wedding a part of my bigger vacation (their generous offer to cover 3 nights stay in Bali helped too, of course!)
3) The couple had also planned a ton of activities on days leading up to the wedding (welcome dinner, city excursions, etc) and arranged for shuttle to take guests from and back, basically coordinated the logistics well and it was no stress.
With that being said, I recently had to send my regret to another Destination Wedding invite to Thailand. I received the invitation right after starting a new job, and the date of the wedding would’ve fallen right on the 6 month mark from starting the job.
1) I was now working with only 3.5 weeks of paid vacations a year, and I already blew through it with just the trips that were booked PRIOR to starting the new job.
2) Technically I could’ve still made it work if I pushed since the wedding date fell on the next calendar year. BUT I felt it was too early in the new job to assess how acceptable it is to take 1-2 weeks of vacation during that time (my job is highly cyclical). I also didn’t want to potentially give my new peers the wrong impression by being gone super often. Turned out it would’ve been just fine, but I didn’t want to risk it.
3) I’ve also already been to Thailand before, but I guess that doesn’t matter since I would go back in a heartbeat if it worked out with my job.
I felt really bad turning down that invitation but I did go to her Bachelorette in Vegas and sent a nice wedding gift. She had a stunning wedding from all the pictures and videos I saw, and still had a pretty good turn out in the end.
BOTTOM LINE: You know your friends/family’s situation the best. If I were you I would just talk to them/survey the crowd and see what’s the best solution for you guys. Good luck bee!
ETA: FWIW my circle is pretty Destination Wedding friendly – some of my friends were even disappointed when they found out I would be hosting mine local LOL. So I was actually surprised when I first found out that the general consensus on the Bee is anti-DW.