(Closed) destination wedding = no shower

posted 5 years ago in Parties
Post # 3
Member
79 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@LadyCupcake:  I think that for the most part, people who have destination weddings don’t have showers.  Or if they do, only those who are invited to the wedding are also invited to the shower.

I am having a destination wedding in June in Disney World and I am having a shower in April.  In my case, only a handful of people will be going to the ceremony, but we are having a large reception at home the week after.  A few special ladies have offered to throw a shower so all of my extended family and friends will be involved in everything. 

I guess it just depends on your situation and if there is any one who offers to throw you one.

Post # 4
Member
396 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think if it is possible you should still be able to have the shower. I’m having a destination wedding and it will be difficult for anyone to give me a shower because we are all so spread out and coming in at the last minute for a wedding. Don’t get too down on it. It doesn’t HAVE to be that way. If you can find the time and place then by all means do it! 

Post # 5
Member
713 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@LadyCupcake:  I am having a really small (family only) destination ceremony and so far everyone else seems to treat this a not having a wedding at all. In my FI’s group of friends there are 4 couples getting married this summer (including us) but we’re the only ones who haven’t had an engagement party thrown for us, there is no talk of bachelor/bachelorette parties, and definitely no shower. I think when you’re having a small destination wedding you just have to focus on the fact that you’re marrying the love of your life and ony the people you really want to be there will be there. You just have to accept that you’re not going to get all of the “traditional” wedding things.

Post # 7
Member
5273 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Do you have BMs? You mentioned that this conversation was with your Future Mother-In-Law, but what about if you told your BMs that you wanted a party (not a shower per say) but just a chance to get together, socialize, and play games minus the pressure of gifts? 

Post # 8
Member
1770 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I haven’t heard of not having a shower just because it’s a Destination Wedding. I’m having a small, slightly last minute shower with the 20 or so women who are invited to the Destination Wedding.

Post # 9
Member
214 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Im having a Destination Wedding and I think I will be having a shower. The Destination Wedding will be fairly intimate about 25 people, but I will be having an at home reception. 

Post # 11
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think you can have a shower.  You should just limit the shower invites to people that were also invited to the wedding. 

Post # 13
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

@LadyCupcake:  I like how you say “oh of course”.  I attended my SIL’s 16 person destination wedding, and she had 100 people at her shower, specifically because she thought a destination wedding was great because you “could get presents from everybody, but not have to pay to feed them”.

Post # 14
Member
9074 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2012

I’ve always assumed that generally you don’t get a shower/bachelorette party/whatever if you have a destination wedding.

People are already paying to fly and be at your wedding, I would not expect them to spend more money on me. Just their presence is a gift enough.

Post # 16
Member
9056 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2010

@LadyCupcake:  That seems really odd.  Maybe your bridesmaids are just a little tapped out?  It doesn’t necessarily have to be a bridesmaid that hosts the shower.  Any non-immediate family person will do.  I had my aunt offer to host mine.  If they really want to throw their shower, there’s nothing to say you can’t have an additional one thrown by a member of your fiance’s family to include them.

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