(Closed) Destination wedding regrets?

posted 6 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 2
Member
240 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2014 - Sedona Golf Resort

I did not regret my decision to have my wedding someplace other than home. We married in Sedona, AZ and although I am from Phoenix, it is a good 2-hours away and guest had to make over night accommodations. If I had any regrets it would be that I care far more about everyone else’s comfort than my own. Because I knew attending  my wedding was an expense for my family, I really tried to take of far too much at the expense of myself. 

I were to do it again, I would have take care of me first and worried about everyone else later. Sounds harsh but after seeing my wedding photos, I could have done better for myself. 

Do what is best for you, there will always be hindsight and second guesses no matter what. 

Post # 3
Member
1166 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

I haven’t yet, but my wedding isn’t until next month so I can’t tell you for sure. I seriously doubt I will regret having done it.  

I will say that destination weddings aren’t always cheaper, we spent six figures for 42 guests (we paid for it ourselves if that matters) and helped close family/friends who couldn’t afford it on their own be there.  

If you want less guests a destination wedding would probably be the way to go, especially if both of your families are from the same area.  Our friends and families were traveling regardless since they are from all over, so the location didn’t make that much of a difference for us in terms of who will actually be attending.  

You can always help close friends and family attend if they can’t manage it on their own financially or send them a copy of your video (videographers are so important, especially for destination weddings for this reason).  

Post # 4
Member
989 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I’m interested to see the replies as we’re having a Destination Wedding in Italy in June. 

I certainly haven’t felt any regret so far…We have 60-65 guests attending so everyone is super excited. 

Post # 5
Member
442 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2013 - Tybee Island, GA

I had a destination wedding at the beach, and wouldnt take back that day for anything. <br />It was awesome working with a wedding planner at the beach while i was at home. I honestly didnt have much stress at all! it was a small 30 people wedding, and it was cheaper (for us) to do it this way. We planned it so we didnt have to invite 100+ people, because we didnt want a big wedding. So, No, no regrets here!

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 7 months ago by  gigglebox.
Post # 6
Member
1083 posts
Bumble bee

Aye, I hate destination wedding. I think they are so self absorbed. Not only do you want a gift, you expect to pay for hotel, board, and use my vacation time for a vacation location I wasn’t even interested in.

the honeymoon is about the couple, the wedding is about celebrating with family.

unless it’s immediate family only (mom, siblings, and grandparents), i think destination wedding couples shouldn’t bother sending invitations to others. 

i don’t even bother responding to the rsvp for thise invites. If you’re so inconsiderate of others, their money and their time, I don’t need to be considerate of your rsvp. It goes straight into my trash.

Post # 7
Member
2689 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

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BookTea:  tell us how you really feel…. lol

Post # 8
Member
3728 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: City, State

My coworker had one and regretted it. It was lovely and wonderful, but she didn’t have the people she wanted there with her and the friends who could come had to scrimp and save to afford it. As a result, she didn’t get to have fun with them (non-wedding related, just normal girl activities) for months. They did it because they loved her, but it was too much to ask of them.

Post # 9
Member
953 posts
Busy bee

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BookTea:  

I feel the same way. Unless you are going to pay for everyone’s lodging it’s selfish. 

Here come to my wedding, pay 2 grand take a week of work and buy me a nice present too.

I am having a destination elopement. It’s what I’ve always wanted. I hate being the center of attention, I don’t need gifts and the wedding is about my SO and I.  I am going back and forth between telling anyone or not and just doing it and telling everyone when I get back.

I have been previously engaged, dress bought, venue deposits..etc and cancelled it ( thank god)  

With this engagement I just want it to be the two of us. Just us. Him and I together and no one else.

I couldn’t see asking everyone to attend in a destination. If I were going to do that I may as well just make it here. 

 

 

Post # 10
Member
109 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

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BookTea:  holy shit girl

Post # 11
Member
738 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

yeah truly, how dare people consider inviting you to a wedding!!!!

Post # 12
Member
989 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

View original reply
BookTea:  
View original reply
smoocherific:  The OP is asking if people who’ve had destination weddings themselves had any regrets afterwards NOT what other Bees opinions of DW’S are. 

FYI, my Destination Wedding is a short flight from my home town and most people are only coming over for 2 nights…They are certainly not paying thousands or using up all their vacation time. I’m going to a wedding a couple of hours drive from where I live next weekend and am paying more for transport and accomodation for that than my guests are to come to my Destination Wedding lol.

Fiance and I actually wanted to elope but our families were really upset by this so the Destination Wedding was the compromise. We made it very clear to everyone that we would understand if they couldn’t make it and we’ve told them their ‘presence is their present’ and we don’t expect anything else. 

  • This reply was modified 5 years, 7 months ago by  SellyJo.
Post # 13
Member
4147 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

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BookTea:  we got married in Scotland. My DH is from there, his parents are still there and aren’t well enough to make the trips to the US. If we wanted his parents at the wedding, it had to be in Scotland. how is that selfish? 

 

I don’t regret anything about my Destination Wedding. But mine was not the “typical” Caribbean beach all inclusive Destination Wedding. We had a full on wedding just in a different country. We had about 65 guests, not everyone we would have wanted there but we checked before hand with the people who were most important to us to make sure they’d be able to come. My BFF of the last 25+ years wasn’t able to attend, and that sucked, but it is what it is and it didn’t ruin our friendship. 

Post # 14
Member
953 posts
Busy bee

Last I looked this was a forum.

Yes I would regret asking everyone to fork out a bunch of money for MY wedding.  I would most definitely feel selfish and self absorbed.

I can’t have an opinion on that or are u stipulating that if it’s a negative opinion on a question it’s an unworthy opinion? 

 

 

Post # 15
Member
2019 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2016

 

View original reply
BookTea:  
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smoocherific:  Maybe you’re forgetting that weddings are optional and most guests are invited out of guilt or familial requirement? Reply “no” on the rsvp and move on with your life. If they get upset that you won’t be coming then they are indeed selfish but chances are good they were hoping for your “no”.

Also, who are weddings actually about anyways?

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