(Closed) Destination wedding woes

posted 4 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 2
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
cjhawks88 :  They’re probably worried about the cost to guests, and possibly about the cost to themselves and/or your brother. Just because your parents and brothers can afford to attend your wedding, it doesn’t mean that’s what they want to do with their money (and their possibly limited vacation time).

Post # 3
47459 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

You went to them telling them you were anxious and overwhelmed, and didn’t want to upset or burden anyone.

Rather than argue that your feelings were not legit, they validated your feelings,

Post # 4
67 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

I know that my family is able to contribute to the wedding which is local for them, but involves travel for me and FH. Basically, instead of what they would have had to all spend in travel, they can help with some wedding costs. Anyway, every family is different, but maybe they are just adjusting to the diffferent scenario than they expected and figuring out the finances.  Also, I have been a little overwhelmed with how much help my mom and family friends are offering to do, so if you have taken it all on yourself, they may be feeling left out? 

With all that being said, I’m not trying to make it seem like it’s your fault, just thinking of the motivation that may be behind their reaction to you. Bet of luck with everything – I’m sure the closer it gets, the more excitement will come!

Post # 5
5362 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: May 2016

Do what is right for you and your Fiance. Of course when you have a Destination Wedding, you have to accept that some people won’t make it, but it seems like you already have. We had a small Destination Wedding in Hawaii with 10 guest, and wouldn’t have changed anything. My husband’s stepdad, wife and daughter couldn’t make it and we had moments where my Father-In-Law (who makes very good money) would act like he couldn’t afford it, and we thought about going back to our original plan of just us…but our wedding week was seriously the best week of our lives and everyone had a blast! Just do what makes you happy! 

And because we just got our pics back, here’s some-

Post # 6
13555 posts
Honey Beekeeper

They obviously share the traditional view that DWs are usually an imposition on guests, putting venue ahead of the people who might want  to be there, and expecting people to spend time and money on your idea of their vacation. 

Unfortunately, most DWs do put a burden on people. I don’t think you can have it both ways. 

Post # 7
3 posts
  • Wedding: September 2018

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