- 11 years ago
- Wedding: June 2011
I’ve so been where you are. Was with x for 6 years, lived together for 5, we had pets together…i saw him through a year long illness (taking him to drs., staying with him and helping him when he couldn’t move, listened to him, let him cry, etc…), and his kids? They were nowhere to be found while he was ill. Didn’t even pick up the phone.
His son…he started getting ito a lot of trouble at school. He was a very disturbed kid, always purposely getting into trouble- even brought a gun to school at one point. Mr. X moved the son in with us, and to make a long story short..he ended up telling me that because his son didn’t like me, we were done. That he had to focus on his son and all of his issues.
he was with a blonde not even a month later, and we were still living together, with him telling me that he just “needed some time”, I caught him with the blonde.
i cannot tell you the devastation. He refused to move beuuase it would “upset his son” and insisted that I get out. I had to move, devastated, heartbroken, and took on all of the expenses of moving. I moved a short distance away, hoping we could patch it up, all the while seeing him move on with the blonde (they broke up shortly after).
There is a lot more that happened after that. He came to visit me at one point, things looked like they might work, etc…just led to more and more heartache.
Then…i met my Fiance. Looking back now, i can see that my former relationship was always all about him. Him, his kids, his alchoholic mother (who i also helped care for), his drug addicted sister and her kids, his lazy brother who always needed money, his illness, his job issues, etc. i do remember him saying once to me “if you’re in a bad mood, don’t bring me down with you”. Well, now that i am looking back, our ENTIRE relationship was about his problems, his drama, etc. My Fiance is always looking out for me, puts me first in his life, talks to me, and worries if I am in a bad mood (which isn’t very often).
It’s hard to see that your relationship is not the right one, when you have a heartache. But, in time, you will look back and realize that the relationship was not healthy for you, and not good enough for you. Trust me, it WILL happen.