- 2 weeks ago
- Wedding: May 2017
My husband and I are moving from a 2000sq home with a 1 hour commute to a 1900sq ft home 30 minutes from work. Our mortgage payment is going up $200/month compared to now, but it was something we both agreed on prior to purchasing the home. We felt the increased cost in mortgage was doable financially and the happiness we would gain from being closer to family and work outweighed anything.
The only downfall to the home is that it does need some renovations. The home we just sold was completely renovated in 2016 from studs to roof, and I think we got lucky with the purchase. The home we are buying is 100% livable, but aesthetically I would like to make some improvements to it including paint, floors, and painting the kitchen cabinets. The home also has no blinds and I would like to at least get blinds in the bathrooms and bedrooms. My parents are being generous and purchasing granite for us as a gift.
At first, my husband agreed to the renovations. We do have some savings and we’re planning to dip into those and most recently we’re considering a home equity line of credit.
Over the last week or so my husband has gotten increasingly against the renovations, stating things like “the house is fine as is” and “you’re going to make us house broke”. I’ve tried explaining to him that I never intended to “make us broke” and that improvements only add equity to the house.
Why am I so frustrated? I’m frustrated because decorating, renovating, etc is my hobby. I’m a full time nurse and mother but this is definitely my go to stress relief gig. Yes, an expensive one, but still nonetheless. My husband claims it’s too expensive and hasn’t stopped complaining about it, but here is my issue:
My husband owns a snowmobile worth about $5k, uses it maybe 4 times a year in winter. This past summer he purchased a $15k Harley motorcycle and used most of our emergency fund savings to do so. We have since rebuilt the savings to what it was.
I have never once made him feel bad about these purchases because I know they are his hobbies and enjoys it. I didn’t feel the motorcycle was the best financial decision we’ve made but now I wish I would have been a smidge more honest about it. Because now I’m being made to feel like the things I want to spend cash on are irrelevant and not important, while he gets to reap in the benefits of his toys.
He’s also going hunting next weekend which is about a $300 trip total. I’ve not said one peep about it and how that money could go towards the home.
We can’t come to agreement and I’m not sure really how to reason with him or make him see my view. Am I the wrong? Should I just give up on my hopes of this?