(Closed) DH is resentful that I'm a SAHM. What can I do?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 211
1430 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

OP, I have to agree with PPs in that I can see your husband’s point of view on this. Wanting to go on vacation once a year, having money to fix up the house, and live a comfortable life is not asking for too much in my opinion. Also being upset at paying your student loans that you incurred for a degree you never really intended to use, isn’t unreasonable to me either. 

If I had to pay back someone else’s loan fof a degree they never intended to use, I’d be upset too. I’d be thinking that they could’ve worked during that time and saved up money for a rainy day in the future when they wouldn’t be working. I think if you can get a part time job or find a way to make money from home, you should. Then you both will get what you want.

Post # 212
258 posts
Helper bee

I find it utterly ridiculous that he is resentful at having to pay “your” student loans.  Sorry but you are a married couple and it’s no longer “your” debts and “his” debts.  They are your debts as a couple.  How anyone be critical of you for obtaining higher education is beyond me.

Back yourself.  You sound like you are a great parent and had a tough time in the 1st year with a tricky tot.  Your husband should be greatful to have a wife who is so well educated and such a diligent mother and wife.  I can understand your confidence in yourself would be completely shattered by this. Your son is lucky to have you, and so is your husband (whether he realises it now or not).

Post # 213
1915 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

I think you should find a way to bring income into the household to lessen the burden on your husband.  Obviously he’s not completely on board with you staying home full time, and feels that you could both benefit from a better standard of living if you were to both work.  

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