DH Medical History

posted 3 years ago in Adoption & Surrogacy
Post # 2
14926 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Are the heart issues on your side genetic diseases?  If it’s not a genetic condition then his side doesnt really matter.  (Genetically predispositioned is not exactly the same as geneticly heriditary diseases)  If you’re worried about passing on genetic diseases you can get a genetic screening (counsyl, good start, i dunno who else).  If you come back clear, then he wouldn’t need to test.  If you come back as a carrier, then he could get tested too to see if you’re both carriers.  (or vice versa) If not, then no problem.  If so, the only way to guarentee to avoid it would be IVF with PGD. 

Post # 3
6533 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

If he doesn’t want to know about his bio family, I’d suggest the genetic testing rather than seeking out literal information.  Depending on when he was adopted, his reality may not be accurate anyway – don’t know the family history, so maybe bio dad isn’t actually bio dad at all – some moms don’t know.  But his DNA can’t lie.  

It’ll tell if there’s a congenital problem but not just bad family history.  As an example regarding heart issues, my family is full of them and it’s 100% the fault of the people with the heart issues for not taking care of themselves, not because of poor genetics.  Cancer too, was generally caused by something environmental in my family.  So that sort of thing can be problem no matter what a genetic screening says.

Post # 4
4233 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Hotel Ballroom

I don’t know the rules about getting his records…but DH’s Mom was adopted. Instead of going through all that, when they were pregnant they sprung for the best genetic testing the 1980’s had to offer. I’m sure worst case they could glean a lot of important stuff from your DH’s blood…or at least the broadstrokes?

Post # 5
1192 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2012

You can do genetic testing. I’d meet with an OB to discuss.  We did genetic testing since we are doing IVF anyway and it was $95 each.  Our doctor’s office has an agreement established with Recombine.  We were tested for 300 something disorders.  My husband was a carrier for 2 and I was for 1.  They weren’t the same so it isn’t a problem.

Post # 6
720 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

No one is going to tell you about someone else’s medical records because that’s their personal information and it’s not legal. To get access to anyone’s medical records you would need explicit permission and a signed letter from that person to get a copy. I also believe that it may need to be notarized by a lawyer. 

If your Darling Husband doesn’t want to meet his biological parents and has no desire to know them, get the genetic testing done. Otherwise you’re in for a very lengthy conversation with his birth parents, possibly a legal fight if they’re adverse to sharing their medical records. 

Post # 7
3607 posts
Sugar bee

I agree with everyone else in that you should go for genetic testing, and I don’t believe you will glean a lot of useful information from such a hunt. My biological father died and I don’t know any of his family, so I certainly understand being nervous about familial health history. However, if he has no desire to meet his biological family or know about them, I think it would be way out of line to look yourself or try and figure it out on your own. I realize you want to know how to do it and not get lectured, but I would be devastated if my SO ignored my wishes about something so personal. Will this information stop you from TTC or having a biological child with your husband? If your family’s heart issues aren’t stopping you, what good would knowing his family has issues do?

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