Diamond Anxiety?

posted 1 year ago in Rings
Post # 16
Member
6 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2013

Yes I have the anxiety you’re speaking of!  We recently had to replace my beloved ring due to theft. My husband picked out the original by himself and I loved it. But I was involved in picking the replacement and found myself becoming a nervous wreck!  I regret letting it all mess with my head. Ultimately I let go of the nitpicking and we picked something that we love. But I still worry that I made a mistake 😕

Post # 17
Member
40 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 1998

I get it!! I’ve never been concerned with all the “fluff” of the diamond but after reading all the knowledgeable people on here, I began to wonder if I was crazy for NOT caring or knowing. I do love to read about everything and I have learned a TON. I’ve been married for 20 years and have had people ask me the specs of my diamond exactly zero times. To me, it’s beautiful, it sparkles and I love it. All that matters. The rest of what I see is fun for educational purposes and sharing in others joy for what they have and love. 

Post # 18
Member
135 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

I worked on a remote fly-in, fly-out diamond mine in the arctic for years. Diamonds were my LIFE and I know more than anyone should about them. That being said, I don’t know the specs of my diamond. I can see one flaw and there are probably more. Don’t know the carat size (I can guesstimate pretty accurately), colour, clarity, nothing. Because really. WHO CARES. Nobody asks. Nobody can tell, unless it’s super poor quality.

Something I picked up at the mine that may help: despite my reservations about diamonds and their shady humanitarian/marketing reputation, it is a beautiful metaphor for married life. The thing that distinguishes a natural diamond from a lab-created diamond are its flaws. Decades ago, Russia tried selling diamonds to Antwerp – they were considered far superior than diamonds from everywhere else and perfect in quality…. suspiciously too perfect… until it was investigated and revealed that they actually were synthetics. Big fraud and Russia was banned from the org for years.  It’s beautiful to think that (one of) the strongest materials on earth is identified because of it’s flaws. If it’s perfect, it’s not a true diamond. Embrace the flaws.

Post # 19
Member
48 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

Aww I think it’s a shame that people should get anxious over this! I do get it because researching the best saddle for my horse took months and I agonized over every detail of different brands, materials, cost, fit ect. However that is what I am passionate about.

My ring?! No I left that to my husband. Hes a smart guy, he isnt silly. I know he will have researched it and made a good choice. I on purpose never asked much about the details and I have no idea of the cost because It doesnt matter and I dont want to know… its not like I am going to sell it now… its MY ring, forever, a symbol of our love and its beautiful and sparkly and clear. That’s good enough for me!

Post # 20
Member
48 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

bluebird12 :  

Wow that sounds such an unusual and amazing job!! I have a question though, what about flawless diamonds? Real diamonds like celebrities have. They cant be fake no?

Post # 21
Member
135 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2019

lavendermist :  Thanks! No such thing as a perfect natural diamond. There are perfect-er diamonds, if that’s a word lol. But objectively, not perfect. Depends on the scale used, which is limited once you get into super high quality diamonds. 

Post # 22
Member
48 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2014

bluebird12 :  

Wow that is so cool. I guess that is nature, perfect in its imperfections 

Post # 24
Member
229 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

I don’t care about specs and didn’t choose my diamond anyway. It was an heirloom from DHs Great Aunt. I didn’t even know the cut or size until researching online recently, and even those are guesses. The fact that she wanted us to have it meant more than I could ever express. The fact that its incredibly beautiful and eyeclean is just a bonus 😜

 

Post # 25
Member
6292 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

Yes! I get what you mean. You can go down a real rabbit hole of diamond specs 😂 That being said no one knows or asks anything in real life and their eyes gloss over if you try to bring it up. So if it sparkles I’d say you’re good!!

Post # 26
Member
331 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2019

My rings have diamonds in. That is the extent of my knowledge. I am very happy with this. I might venture to suggest some bees are a little unhealthily obsessed with the size and value of their diamonds but I wouldn’t dare xx

Post # 27
Member
1200 posts
Bumble bee

lavendermist :  The Japanese have a word for it that I love.. wabi-sabi. It means beauty that is imperfect or finding beauty in imperfections.

Post # 28
Member
1384 posts
Bumble bee

Yes! It definitely makes me anxious sometimes. Especially because I ‘thought’ I was pretty analytical when picking out my diamond. I looked at inclusion maps, spreads of the tables, etc. Only to find out later there is the HCA tool and my diamond does not score well at all. Lol. I kick myself and try not to think about it. I feel like it sparkles in person so much, but doesn’t photograph like some of the ones on here!! However, I cannot tell what’s diamond vs moissy om here if not specified so that could cloud my comparison too.

Post # 30
Member
870 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I literally never think about any of this, and definitely not to the point of getting anxious about it! 

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