Post # 1
My FI and I met on okcupid in late 2010. We talked for a couple months until I was comfortable with the idea of meeting, had a pretty average first date but a spectacular second date. We’ve had a great romance. But I hate when people ask how we met, because I still feel the stigma associated with it. We’re both shy people, but I don’t feel like I was giving up by going online. I don’t know if you’ve seen the episode of How I Met Your Mother where Ted meets a girl online and introduces her to his friends, making up some elaborate and cute story about how they met because she’s embarassed. I kind of wish we had a sweet story like that, but whenever someone asks I just say “online” and hope they don’t inquire further.
Post # 3
Why lie about it? I see nothing wrong with meeting someone from online? I met my DH on Plentyoffish.com and I have never had people question or raise their eyes at how we met. My best friend, she also met her husband online…
Don’t be embrassed by it, be proud that you found someone who you love. So what if it was online, it is soo not a big deal anymore!
Post # 4
@Sassygrn: I never said I lied about it. I referenced a TV show where a character lies about how they met someone. I disagree about it not being a big deal. I think for people in their 40s and up, meaning my parents’ generation, it seems very strange. I’m not embarassed by how we met; I’m thrilled that we got the chance to meet when we never would have in person. But for the rest of our lives people will ask how we met, and I just vaguely wish that I had a nice story to tell them. Just saying “online” kind of ends the conversation, but I can’t go into why we were both looking online without being comfortable with the people. I was bored and he was lonely doesn’t sound very romantic.
Post # 5
We met online. DH and I are both computer nerds, so it actually fits us well. I was role-playing with a friend from high school, (nerd roleplaying, not sexy roleplaying! LOL!), and she was talking to a coworker on AIM. She mentioned that we had a lot in common, and we should talk, so she gave me his AIM name.
We started talking, and he said he wanted to show me his lightsaber. Yeah, turns out, he’d actually made a lightsaber for a movie he and some friends made, (see, we’re nerds!). Anyway, we got to talking about movies, he said he’d just seen “Dodgeball” and I said I wanted to see it. He offered to take me. We spent twelve hours together that first date, and we’ve been together ever since.
DH loves to tell people “we met online” which I guess is technically true. I like to say we met through a mutal friend. Before our first date, his friends were all telling him I was probably some 40 year old trucker.
Post # 6
I completely agree with Sassygrn! The more honest people are about how they met online, the more any perceived stigma will dissipate! Plus it gives single folks encouragement to try it themselves if they hadn’t already.
Just today I went to try on dresses at Vera Wang and the very nice Vera consultant asked me how I met my FI. I told her it was on Craig’s List. She thought it was awesome. I told her I had been on match, eharmony, all the pay sites, and then I put this ad on CL and struck gold.
Congrats on your online nups ladies! 🙂
Post # 7
@katehh08: Well I am 38, so I am close to your parents age and my friend who met her husband is 40 so I have to disagree on that. Many of my friends who are my age or older have me their SO from online. My parents are in their 60’s and they thought was strange at first when started to meet men online, I started to meet people from online over 10 years ago!
My first date with my DH consisted of going to a different place to eat than the one we met at due to over an hour wait. Then after that we decided to go look at Christmas lights so we were going to leave his car at my apt complex (since we were in my neck of the woods). Yeah that didn’t work because when we were going to leave my apt complex I had blown a tire…. That is exactly what we tell people when we are asked how we met. Was it the greatest date in the world no, but we a good time and liked each other enough we went on another date and then another and so forth….
Post # 8
@katehh08: Older people get it. I’m 36, FI is 50. I told my 80-year-old parents we met online and they didn’t look at me askance at all.
Post # 9
My fiancee and I met on OKC too! He always tells people a silly story, that is in no way true, and I come in and correct it.
(His version involves being on parole and needing a tutor as part of his probation. He’s a bit of a smart alec.)
I was a bit embarrased at first when I would tell people we met online, because at the time it was not the most common way you meet your future husband. It’s becoming much more normal now. I now have no problem telling the true story.
Post # 10
- Wedding: January 2013 - Atrium at the Curtis Center
I met my fiance on match.com, and I love our story. We don’t just say “we met online” we go through the whole process of how we connected through similar interests, how it ended up we had so much common ground, how I would have never seen him because he was younger than my search pool – your story is what you make it. If you just want it to be – we met online – then that’s fine! It’s a great story regardless, because it ends with two people in love – who doesn’t love that story!!
Post # 11
We didn’t meet online, but that doesn’t mean we have a good story. Nothing better about not meeting online.
Post # 12
We met on the SEGA’s Phantasy Star Online, a video game. We’re both in our late 30s and have been together since 2001. 11 years ago, I admit it was kind of strange and awkward to admit we nerded out and met on a game. But now we embrace it and it’s a HUGE part of our wedding next month. Lots and lots of gamer reference in music and decor. 🙂
Post # 13
I met my boyfriend on eHarmony, but we have a great great story.
We actually went to the same middle school, high school, and college, and we were involved all of the same things (choir, theatre), but we never met because he was 4 years ahead of me!
My dad also met his wife on eHarmony, and nobody has ever questioned how any of us met our partners.
Post # 14
My best friend’s fiance actually messaged her on Xanga when they were 13 because he liked her profile picture (which happened to be the album cover of Van Halen’s “1984”- the one with the cherub smoking), and they are still together now; he moved from PA to KY to be with her! I love their story, and they met online.
Just because you met your SO online doesn’t neccessarily mean you have a boring story. There’s always an interesting twist to it 🙂
Post # 15
We met online (pof.com) and I love our story! He found me but I wasn’t looking for a relationship. I was separated, waiting for the final decree and had been lonely & miserable for years. I just wanted to feel good again – a nice dinner, or coffee and pleasant conversation. I made it all clear to the men who wrote to me and I met a few in person with that understanding. By FH was gently persistant, clever, kind & patient. I found an email from him waiting for me every morning and we would often IM at night. Finally I got very curious and decided to meet him for dinner. It was election night 2008 and I expected a 1 hour dinner then home and instead we spent 5 hours talking, listening to music in his car and walking around Bass Pro (lol). I refused to call it a date. At the end of the evening, he asked if he could kiss me, which was perfect. From then on we IMed every night for hours (I love the written word) and spent every possible weekend together. I wasn’t looking for a relationship, but my 84 yr old mother was actually the one who encouraged me to explore it. As she says, we were meant to be!
Post # 16
I just don’t allow what other people think to control me, which is what your actually doing when you say that there is a ‘Stigma’ attached to it…
I’m also in my 40’s as is FI and I have only yet found one person that had something negative to say about it…
Love is NOT a profile so don’t keep yourself locked in its boundaries, break out and set yourself free to feel proud of the fact that YOU FOUND LOVE (even if it was on the internet!)