Post # 47
@agaldesign: Even though its what I want I do, a little bit. My last name is really unique and so is FI’s. But mine has so much emotional meaning to it. Fiance would 100% take mine but I want to take his. I like it a lot, it’s got the same letter as my first name and I will move up in the alphabet. I would say focus on the positives like I am, if its what you want to do, and know that it will always be a part of you :]
Post # 48
aww man i didnt even think if this.. I got all choked up reading everyones comments
Post # 49
I really really loved my whole name – – first middle and last — so I hyphenated. If it really upsets you to loose your last name, then don’t. Nowhere does it say you have to (if you’re in the USA)
Post # 50
@agaldesign: I totally feel this way. I think combining the names or hyphenating them is more trouble than it’s worth, but I am sad to give up my last name. I’m getting married in two weeks… and I feel like I will change my name… but I’m not going to push myself to do it immediately. I’ll do it when I’m ready to. I really do want to and I know eventually I will. I just don’t know that it needs to happen RIGHT NOW. I guess that means I’m more ambivalent about it than I thought… I’d want to do it before we start having kids for sure though.
Post # 51
- Wedding: June 2013 - Upstate NY
I was one of only ONE in the country with my name and now I’ll be one of like 50,000!
Post # 52
Yep, definately a bit sad! I took my exes last name, it was horrible, but in 1996, it was still pretty much what one did. As soon as we divorced I got my maiden name back! Giving it up again is going to be hard, as I do love my Italian last name and his is common and sounds strange with my name. He’s very traditional and always says he can’t wait until I’m Mrs >>>>.
I brought up hyphenating and didn’t get a positive response there either, him saying I’m not a TV personality or writer etc, LOL
I don’t understand how changing a last name to a middle name is any different than hyphenating??
Sooo…I will be changing mine again.
Post # 53
I always thought I’d be so excited to change it, used to doodle my married name all the time just like when we were 13 lol… Mrs. Cheryl F_______ lol. My last name is pretty common and plain jane, always felt like I couldn’t wait to change it. My fiance’s last name is a much more unique french name.
Now that this whole marriage thing is approaching and becoming reality, I find myself feeling sad and anxious when i think about changing my name… like I’m giving up a piece of myself… which seems silly on one hand, but on the other, our name is such a fundamental part of our identity.
i’m just not going to rush the change, and do it when I feel ready, however soon or long it takes. I’m a teacher too, So I’m used to be called by my last name every day… I’ll miss it when I change it someday. I might wait til we have kids before I do it. And I’ll probably move my maiden name and make it a second middle name
Post # 54
@agaldesign: I am very much looking forward to my last name changing..mainly becuase of horrible family issues…
but anyways i can definitely see how it could be hard considering its been your last name for 30years!!
Post # 55
I feel this way too. I’m in my 30s too and when I was a teenager I guess I just assumed I’d be taking my husband’s name once I got married; I never really considered any alternatives and back then it wasn’t really “normal” where I live not to take the man’s name.
But now that I’ll be getting married in 2015, I don’t know what I’m going to do. My parents want me to keep my name, my BF wants me to take his name, he won’t take my name (he says people will think I “wear the pants” and will see him as less of a man….Don’t get me started), we don’t want to hypenate and we both kind of like the idea of melding our names into one name. Strangely enough our last names meld together in a pretty amazing way. My mom’s all for it but my dad’s not, although I know it’s not about them.
So I basically have narrowed it down to 3 options: 1) Keep my name, 2) Take his name or 3) Meld our names together.
Either way I feel sad about the options:/
I swear it would be easier just to drop my last name and be like Cher…
Post # 56
I’m the opposite. I’m excited for a new last name!!! My current last name has the word “Hell” in it, which I never liked. Not that it really mattered, but people always commented it. I’ll be moving to a somewhat generic last name, but I love it. Plus I am going to be a teacher, and I think simple last names always sounds very teachery!
Post # 57
I am really upset that I won’t be taking his name. It sounds just awful when combined with my first name and both he and fmil have told me not to take it. I am not related to a single person with my last name (got it from my mum who remarried), and always looked forward to changing it. Makes me sad 🙁
Post # 58
I always assumed that I would change my last name. I hate that my last name is always horribly mispronounced. But now that it is actually almost time to do it, I am having doubts. It seems like it is part of my identity. I don’t know how to view myself as this new person with this new name.
Post # 59
Yes. And that’s why I’m not. I love my last name and I’m keeping it.
Post # 60
I do. My dad had all sisters as do I. I am the last bearer of the family name and it saddens me to think it dies once I change my name. So far, 9 months, I have not changed my name but know once future kids are in anything that I will automatically be called Mrs. DH.
Post # 61
I’m sad about it, I have a very unique and Italian last name that I love. My dad was born in Italy and passed away 16 years ago. He was the only son and only had my sister and I so our last name is done in the United States. 🙁