Did anyone NOT have a bridal shower, and regret it?

posted 2 years ago in Parties
Post # 2
781 posts
Busy bee

Seems like bridal shower is a no go for you! Thats ok, it’s not necessary. I’d kindly decline the nice offer, and let them know you appreciate the gesture. No hard feelings 🙂 

Being that it’s a quick engagement, its more the reason to not worry or be stressed about those details and all of the ‘what if’s’. 

Maybe let them take you out to a brunch or something if they want to spend time with you before the big day!

Post # 3
1388 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2020

I’m not having a bridal shower. My family doesn’t have the Dynamics/drama yours does, so that’s not an issue, it’s simply because I don’t need the stuff. I can barely find items to put on my official registry, and feel guilty over asking that little bit! 

I’m also not having a bachelorette party, but rather spending a quality day with each of my bridesmaids. 


If the party is causing you this much stress, plus the short engagement, I’d suggest nixing it. You can celebrate with them in small groups if you want, and avoid the hassle of a full party. But if you really want a bridal shower, then I would let your step-mom host and trust your mom to be drama free.

Post # 4
1272 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2019

I’m not having one, even though my future Mother-In-Law offered to throw one. FH and I are older (31 and 39), and we already have pretty much everything we need, so having a shower seemed garish and unneccesary to me. The fact that you said you’d be having a shower to please everyone else despite your own comfort says everything. You’re not obligated to have a shower if you don’t want one.

Post # 5
2352 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

View original reply
mtbee26 :  I didn’t have a bridal shower and don’t regret it one bit, I don’t like being the center of attention and feel uncomfortable accepting gifts from pretty much anyone other than my husband and immediate family, which consists of two people. Bridal showers are just not my thing, doesn’t really sound like it’s yours either.

Post # 6
529 posts
Busy bee

I’m not having a bridal shower or bachelorette party- I’m just not sure what those things are for… I’ll likely just do something fun, relaxed and easy with a few friends. I’ve never been to a bridal shower, as no one I know has ever opted to do one. 

It doesn’t sound like something you’d remember or regret not doing, from reading the stressful factors involved. 



Post # 8
2080 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2018

I didn’t have a shower because we basically had a no-gifts wedding, but I did have a fun bachelorette that I really loved. I’ve always found the idea of an all-female shower to open gifts to be rather awkward, so I’m with you.

Post # 9
865 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2020 - Hampton, VA

I didn’t get an engagement party, bridal shower thrown for me.

I thought that was the norm – that others host them. Is it tacky to host something for ourselves?? I’d like to have a bridal shower because I would like to celebrate being a bride! :/ I don’t necessarily want gifts or anything.

My family isn’t super traditional though, so I don’t expect them to “do what’s expected” when a family member gets engaged… I wish they were sometimes, though.

Post # 10
2791 posts
Sugar bee

View original reply
mtbee26 :  I did not want a bridal shower. People offered to throw one for me, and I politely declined. My Mother-In-Law really wanted to throw one for me, so I said that was okay, if she truly wanted to. Our engagement was short (5 months), and in the end, my Mother-In-Law said she couldn’t throw me a bridal shower because she was throwing her daughter’s best friend’s fifth bridal shower. I don’t regret not having one. 

Post # 11
3846 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017 - City, State

I didn’t do an engagement party, bridal shower, or bachelorette party. All were offered, all were declined. It was an extra event I didn’t want to have till think about. I don’t regret it at all. I have plenty of opportunities to hang with friends and loved ones and share drinks and laughter. I didn’t need a party for it.

Post # 12
1630 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2019 - City, State

View original reply
mtbee26 :  I told my bridesmaids this morning that I would feel more comfortable with no bridal shower.  I feel SO relieved!  It’s a great tradition for most brides, but not all.  Own your truth.  I don’t think you’ll regret it.

Post # 13
10412 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2016

I didn’t do any of the pre-wedding parties (engagement, shower, bachelorette) and have no regrets. If you don’t want to have one don’t feel pressured to have one.

Post # 14
556 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

We had a couples shower at a wine bar at night with gifts totally optional. It was really fun and I have no regrets. Do what makes you feel good! 

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