(Closed) Did having a first look ruin the moment?

posted 7 years ago in Photos/Videos
  • poll: Are you doing (or did you do) a first look
    yes : (57 votes)
    48 %
    no : (60 votes)
    50 %
    other please explain : (2 votes)
    2 %
  • Post # 32
    16 posts
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I had always pictured the first time seeing each other to be when i walked down the aisle but based on our ceremony start time, we needed to do pictures beforehand if we wanted to do them outdoors. We did a first look and I 100% do not regret it. Not only do I love how our photographer captured the moment, but we got a few minutes to just kind of take in the moment. I must say, he did have the same reaction of me walking down the aisle as he did at the first look <3 (the first picture is from our photographer, the 2nd my friend captured on her camera). But ultimately do whatever you feel is right for you!

    Post # 33
    2747 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    We DIDN’T do a first look but we DID do an “around the corner” before the ceremony which heightned the excitement of seeing him as I walk down the aisle (and also boatloads of tears!)


    Then on the aisle:

    Post # 34
    1508 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I plan to do a FL(Fi doesnt care either way).

    My reason, it will take away some of the nerves and hopefully I will get my tears out then, so my makeup can be touched up before the ceremony.

    Post # 35
    357 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    @mrsbruff2b:  Your pictures are absolutely lovely <3

    Post # 36
    344 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I’m confused by the poll. Is the question whether you did a first look or did a first look ruin the walk down the aisle. I don’t think you’ll be able to gain anything from the poll. I’ll tell you that 75% of my clients do them and none have ever regretted it. I have had many say they wished they had. 

    Post # 37
    52 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: July 2013

    @mrsbruff2b:  i love the “around the corner” look, your pictures are so pretty!

    Post # 38
    9672 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Yeah I’m guessing the poll is getting a lot of wrong votes…

    We did a first look and I do not regret it at all. It was much more special to me than the walk down the aisle with a ton of people staring at us.

    Post # 39
    3139 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Some of my favourite photos if not most of them are from before the ceremony. Our first look brought tears to my sons (had first look w him too) and my dear wife’s eyes. And there were still tears as I walked down the aisle, from me and son and wife and guests !!! The ceremony is over too quickly and because we had Our reception immediately after we ran out of time for photos. 

    Post # 40
    1511 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2013

    @imanw:  I voted “other” because I’m not really sure what we’ll end up doing. 

    When I picture my wedding day, I imagine the first time my fiance and I see each other will be when I’m walking down the aisle.  We’ve talked about the possibility of a first look, and my fiance isn’t crazy about the idea.  He has also always imagined that the first time he sees me that day will be as I walk toward him down the aisle.

    But … I don’t know what our timeline will be like.  We still have 9 months before the wedding (9 months exactly tomorrow!), but we probably should start thinking about when we’ll be taking the pictures.  Logistically, I think we should at least consider it.  I don’t want to feel rushed taking pictures (I already assume we’re going to miss out on cocktail hour due to picture taking), and I’d love to get some really sweet, really genuine shots.  I just don’t know.  (And I really don’t want to regret our decision … No matter which way we go.)

    I will say that I absolutely love the pictures that have been posted in this thread!  It really makes me want to do a first look.  

    Post # 41
    779 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    OKay, I WOULD do it, but my Fiance is just not the type to really get emotional over anything like that. The whole point is how the groom responds to how beautiful his future wife is (maybe it’s a little of you reacting to him, but really, if we’re being honest, it’s their reaction to how smokin’ hawt his future wifey is and how stinkin’lucky he got!)

    But my Fiance really just isn’t very emotional. He’ll be happy, and he might blush a little, but no tears, no shock, nothing like that. He’s reeeeally reserved. Which I know doesn’t mean he doesn’t love me more or less than a guy who’ll bawl and gush and just go nuts when he sees his bride for the first time, but I just know how my Fiance will react.


    Post # 42
    23 posts
    • Wedding: October 2012

    the first look did not ruin the moment it was just as special. Walking down the aisle was amazing too my husband cried both times!

    Post # 43
    1585 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    Our wedding isn’t here yet, but we decided to do a first look for a number of reasons.


    This was a REALLY difficult decision that I think I’m glad I made. We’ll see once the day gets here. I always imagined my groom’s face as he first saw me coming down the aisle too and never even HEARD of a first look until I began planning our wedding.


    -He doesn’t get to see you go down the aisle for the first time. That traditional moment of him gasping or tearing up as you appear in his line of vision doesn’t happen as you approach him to become his partner.

    This is only one con but I ABSOLUTELY agree that it is a huge one. It was so hard to step away from that. On the other hand, here were the pros I came up with:

    -A quiet moment alone before the wedding to calm the butterflies and remind yourself that you want to go through with it.
    -Amazing picture opportunities.
    -The ability to have that first look with him from close up, not from across a crowded hall. It is far more intimate.
    -Timing! If you have a first look beforehand, you can get most of the pictures out of the way beforehand and enjoy more of your wedding. None of that getting married and then disappearing for 45 minutes of photos!


    Like I said, I always dreamed of that dramatic moment when I entered and he hopefully gasped at how beautiful I looked. But that can happen in a private environment. From all I have heard, coming down the aisle and the first look first-impression aren’t similar enough to sully the experience.

    Post # 44
    609 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2013

    @nativedesires:  Okay, you two seriously just made me cry. I love the expressions on your faces. So so so cute.

    Post # 45
    542 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    @almostmrsj:  Perfectly said!!  Omg you just brought a tear to my eye and so much excitement to my body.  Lol. I can’t wait!!!  

    Post # 46
    159 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: August 2014

    Wedding hasn’t happened yet. I was really against a FL, but I am now reconsidering because of this thread.

    I was pretty adamently against a first look. It seemed like it’d ruin the special moment. Problem is, my top choice venue (not solidified yet) only has two options for wedding ceremony/reception packages, either morning until early afternoon or evening until late. My FH and I really wanted our wedding to be in the evening for a sit down meal, plus, we want to party it up late into the night!

    Unfortunately, we only get access to the venue at 5pm if we do the evening option. That means that if we wait until after the ceremony to do photos, it might already be getting dark and we won’t have lovely, bright photos in the gardens. As such, to get garden photos, we’d have to do a first look. I was incredibly disappointed, but all these people who are happy with their decision to do it are making me feel better about the idea!

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