(Closed) Did he ask your father first??

posted 8 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 47
Member
1278 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

I kinda wish mine had but he didnt:( 

Post # 48
Member
504 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

He asked both my parents. Or, at least, he spoke with them and told them his intentions. I think they were both impressed he did this and it showed he respected them, as well as me.

Post # 49
Member
1796 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

Personally, I find this tradition insulting and am surprised that it remains so popular. I’d never marry someone who asked first.

Post # 50
Member
130 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: December 2015

I am an adult. I don’t need daddy’s permission to get married. 

Post # 51
Member
4272 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

No. He asked my mother. My dad is not really active in my life.

Post # 52
Hostess
8574 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

My “father” isn’t in my life, so there wasn’t a need for him to ask. He did ask my mother though.

Post # 53
Member
1769 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

Yes, Fiance asked my dad and mom first. He knew it was important to me.

Post # 54
Member
10361 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

Nope. I find the practice offensive and antiquated. He knew better than to ask!

Post # 55
Member
1863 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

He asked for both of my parents blessing before. 

Post # 56
Member
4192 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

He asked for my Dad’s *blessing*, which I had told him I wanted him to do. I’m the only daughter, and I knew it would mean a lot to my Dad, which it did.

I also made it clear to DH- blessing, not “permission.”

Post # 57
Member
814 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2012

I told my husband (then bf) that if he EVER asked anybody (father or anyone els) for permission/blessing to marry me, I’d say no. I was dead serious. I’m an adult, I do not need the permission or blessing of someone else to do whatever the hell I want. Makes me angry just thinking about it lol.

Post # 58
Member
3315 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2009

I would have been appalled if my Fiance had asked anyone in my family for permission to marry me–and doubly so if s/he (I’ve had one of each gender) had asked my father but not my mother.

Post # 59
Member
1900 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

View original reply
@bella128:  Yeah, my family was pretty much the same. Fiance’s parents were horrified that he didn’t ask my dad, so fiance called him up and stammered out an apology and explained that he had proposed and forgotten to ask dad. Dad couldn’t stop laughing – he figured it was fine as long as I had said “yes.”

To be honest, I would have preferred he gave my parents a heads up before proposing – not to ask for permission, but just because fiance’s parents knew what was going on, so it’s only fair that my parents did too.

Post # 60
Member
113 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

FH texted my parents and set up a lunch to ask them & then he showed them the ring. My mom was so worried he wanted to ask about getting me a puppy. They said no puppy but yes to engagement! 🙂

Post # 61
Member
53 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

My Fiance did. He is a bit of an old soul. I was happy he did, my dad just told him to hurry up already! Not that we had been dating long but I think my dad has a man crush on him lol

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