(Closed) Did he ask your parents’ permission to marry you?

posted 10 years ago in Family
  • poll: Did he ask your parents for permission to marry you?
    Yes, he asked permission, for their blessing, or otherwise informed them and I'm glad he did : (282 votes)
    68 %
    Yes, but I wish he hadn't...we are adults! : (2 votes)
    0 %
    No, and I'm glad he didn't...we are adults! : (93 votes)
    22 %
    No, but I wish he had asked or informed them : (24 votes)
    6 %
    Other (explain below) : (13 votes)
    3 %
  • Post # 3
    Member
    2695 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: February 2008

    Yes, he did, and I thought it was lovely when I found out later. I think my father appreciated it and it sure got my parents excited for that phone call, which took another 5 weeks to come ๐Ÿ™‚  I was 30, had been living on my own since college, but I still thought it was very sweet for my husband to give my Dad that old world courtesy ๐Ÿ™‚

    that said, I totally understand why some people don’t like the tradition and that in some circumstances it just doesn’t work/make sense!

    Post # 4
    Member
    52 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    He did and I knew he was going to (and then I found out when he did it when I accidently came across my parents number in his call history, oops!)  It was more talking to both my mom and my dad before the proposal rather than asking them for permission.  It was something memorable that they can all look back on ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 5
    Member
    303 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    My Fiance hasn’t even met my parents yet! I met his, and we talked to them about getting married, and they’re all for it. Unfortunately, my parents are super religious, and since neither he nor I are of the same religion as they are (and I haven’t officially informed them that I don’t want anything to do with the religion I was raised in), it’s going to get a little sticky. He offered to ask my dad, but I told him that I would rather him not ask. I didn’t want my parents to get the impression that I necessarily needed their permission…or blessing…because once they discover that we aren’t going to raise their grandchildren in their faith, I highly doubt that I’m going to get either their permission or blessing. Sigh…we’ll handle it though!

    Post # 6
    Member
    2007 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: September 2009

    I selected other because it was kind of "permission" but more of an "I would be honored if you would let me join your family" and he didn’t just ask my dad.  He also asked my mom, sisters and I think even my aunts, uncles and cousins!  Everyone was incredibly touched to have been included and he definitely earned some major brownie points with my family!

    I loved it. 

    Post # 7
    Member
    208 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2009

    Yes, it was very sweet.  He dressed up in a suit and brought the ring over to show them.

    Post # 8
    Member
    180 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2009

    My Fiance asked my stepdad one night when we were over for dinner. They were outside talking for a while alone, but my mom and I didn’t think anything of it. My Fiance knew that if he asked my mom, she would never be able to keep it a secret. We are so close and talk everyday and she would be too excited to handle it!

    Post # 9
    Member
    152 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: October 2009

    He sure did! He called them to ask permission, and my parents were thrilled. I enjoy the tradition, and  I figured my Fiance would call.

     Funny thing is, when he called my parents I was in Switzerland visiting a friend. His plan was to propose someplace gorgeous in Switzerland. So, of course I said yes, and when I called home to tell them, they were excited. But slowly, as I made other phone calls to family….  I realized that everyone already knew =) My mom was SOOO excited that she told most of her family, and even put flowers in the church in "honor of our engagement"… all before he proposed!!  =) I love my mom!

    Post # 10
    Member
    41 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2009

    i programmed by fathers phone number into my FI’s phone and for the name i put in "ask my dad"!!! although my Fiance is very traditional and would have asked anyway, i wanted to make sure he had the number!! pushy…yes…but, now it makes him laugh every time he goes through his phone looking for a number!!  i was very happy he did that, although i think my stepmother had a hard time containing herself after..she didn’t call me for awhile!! she was worried she would ruin it!

    Post # 11
    Member
    813 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: May 2018

    My Fiance asked my parents’ permission. He was all secretive about it, and so my parents knew that it was coming. When he got to their house, he was sooo nervous and kept rambling. Finally my mom told him that they knew why he was there, which helped his nerves a little!

    That has to be a very difficult thing for our FI’s to do!!!!!!! How nerve wracking! 

    Post # 12
    Member
    41 posts
    Newbee
    • Wedding: August 2008

    He flew all the way down to New Mexico from Chicago to ask my dad in person! It was above and beyond, and meant a lot to my parents and me. I was so surprised when I found out later. He’s the best!

    Post # 13
    Member
    776 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    My Fiance asked my mom. She came to visit us a few weekends before he proposed. She was so moved that he asked her! He even showed her the ring too, lucky her ๐Ÿ™‚

    Post # 14
    Member
    398 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: February 2009

    My husband did ask, but over the phone since my parents live 2000 miles away.  I was impressed that he came out of his shell to do so!

    Post # 15
    Member
    6009 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: May 2009

    My Fi talked to his parents first (mom and dad separately) to make sure they were on board.  Then he called my mom and dad (separate phone calls again) to let them know he was planning to ask and to get their blessing.  Apparently my dad gave him a big lecture about the responsibilities of marriage, but my mom was so excited she just started calling family with the news!

    Post # 16
    Member
    2022 posts
    Buzzing bee

    Yes!  He talked to my dad before he bought my ring.  My dad asked if he could tell my mom, and Fiance said yes.  My mom then called Fiance immediately to talk to him : )  I am glad that he did.  My parents are traditional in this way and it went a long way.

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