(Closed) Did he ask your parents’ permission to marry you?

posted 12 years ago in Family
  • poll: Did he ask your parents for permission to marry you?

    Yes, he asked permission, for their blessing, or otherwise informed them and I'm glad he did

    Yes, but I wish he hadn't...we are adults!

    No, and I'm glad he didn't...we are adults!

    No, but I wish he had asked or informed them

    Other (explain below)

  • Post # 62
    Member
    1119 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2009

    He asked my father and my mother for permission, while we were there for Christmas. There was so much going on that I wasn’t even aware they had had the conversation – until he proposed a few weeks later and when I called them they already knew. I still don’t know how my mom managed to keep it a secret!

    Post # 63
    Member
    6571 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: February 2010

    he didn’t, and i was surprised and kind of confused and hurt that he didn’t at first. until he told me the reason, my mom is a gossip and can’t keep her mouth shut, she totally would have given it away. now i can’t blame him for that.

    Post # 64
    Member
    193 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2010

    He asked my parents the morning before he asked me. I found this funny because we already have a child together.. my response when he told me he spoke with my father was “you didn’t ask them for permission before you knocked me up!”

     

    Post # 65
    Member
    3124 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2009

    He didn’t, and i’m glad he didn’t.  I love my parents, but it’s not any of their business really.  At least, permission-wise.  I of course shared the news right away.

    Post # 66
    Member
    6593 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2010

    He took my father out to lunch and let him know his intentions – didn’t ask his permission or blessing because we have been leaving together for 4 years and bought a house with my dad’s help (he is a real estate agent) 2 years ago!

    I thought it was very sweet!

    Post # 67
    Member
    4765 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

    He kind of did – we both knew it would mean a lot to my parents for him to ask their blessing, but to be honest, I am not very close to my parents and didn’t ever really feel like I “needed” to have their blessing. He asked me first, and then called them later to ask for their blessing – they still think that they knew beforehand, so everyone is happy.

    Post # 68
    Member
    2560 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: July 2010

    He didn’t, but there was really no need since my parents (my Dad especially) has been harassing him for over a year about when he was going to finally get it done.

    Post # 69
    Member
    715 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: February 2010

    What a great thread (even though by this boards standards, it’s ancient). Darling took dad for tea and asked him for his blessing. I am a total daddy’s girl. Him giving his blessing was very special for me.

    But actually mom told me later that dad was like, “did he really have to ask? I mean what did he think I was going to say? No?”

    Post # 70
    Member
    4381 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2010 - Ceremony - First United Methodist Church; Reception - My parents' house!

    My fiance asked my father’s permission in September, and we got engaged on that following NYE. It was so sweet how he asked my dad, and apparently he said some wonderful and sweet things to my fiance. And, of course, said yes. I really like the tradition of asking the father’s permission, if possible. 🙂

    Post # 71
    Member
    825 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2010

    He didn’t ask my parents, and I’m glad. Before we got engaged, he asked me if I wanted him to go to my dad, and I said “Absolutely not!” We’re both adults and I am offended at the idea of being treated either like a child, or worse, like a piece of property. He was relieved, since he thought it was an antiquated tradition, too 🙂

    Although to be fair I had been discussing with my mom that we were talking about getting married so it’s not like it came out of the blue. 

    Post # 72
    Member
    2626 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2009

    Yep…he asked my parents and I’m so glad he did.  Infact, I told him that if he proposed without asking my dad, I wouldn’t give him an answer until they had spoken. lol  My parents are very traditional and my dad always told me that a guy had better ask for his permission.  I don’t think it was so much as “the permission” thing, but more of a sign of respect that my Fiance has for my parents. 

    Post # 73
    Member
    102 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: September 2010

    yes he asked both my parents and I thought he was in the bathroom the whole time bc it was awhile and I got worried he wasn’t feeling well lol after he proposed I found out where he really was n I was like oh I thought u fell in lol

    Post # 74
    Member
    950 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    eh…we’ve been together for so long (11 years), that “asking permission/blessing” would’ve felt exactly like the formality we both think (imho) it is.  We both believe that this relationship is primarily between us (I think God is involved, too) and not any other person.  So I’m glad our married life starts out with that in mind right from the get-go.

    Post # 75
    Member
    145 posts
    Blushing bee

    Nope my guy is not going to be asking my parents permission. We’ve both discussed it and luckily feel the same way. We’re both still in college and my parents have made it very clear that they don’t want me to get married until I graduate (which is when I am). I worry that my parents might say no if he asks, and we don’t want them to make this decision for us, so I feel it’s more respectful to not ask them instead of possibly directly disobeying them. We will of course tell them right afterwards (I live at home still so I don’t really have a choice) and reassure them that we’re not idiots if they do freak out.

    Post # 76
    Member
    1060 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2010 - Anela Garden Chapel & Japanese Cultural Center, Honolulu

    Fiance asked my dad, which my dad was really happy about, since dad got to “set things right”.  Apparently back when he asked my grandfather for his blessing, he got a big fat “no”. It was important to him to be able to verbally show his support for us :3

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